You and me could write a bad romance
by rukelover
Summary: This one is very slightly AU. Set a little back in the past and here Luke tries to get rid of the silver spoon and make it on his own. He quits his job at Damian's company and wants to go back to school.Noah is still blind and they still have broken up.
1. Chapter 1

Luke was just about to get up when he saw Dr. Oliver walk into Java's and head straight towards his table.

''May I'' he pointed his head towards a free seat wearing his usual ill-tempered expression.

Before Luke could answer he sat down and looked directly at him.

''I need your money.''

''Excuse me?'' Luke eyed him up and down, an amused smile on his lips.

''I need a donation from your fund for the hospital. Do you think there is anything you can do?''

''Well thanks for asking so friendly and considerately but you're wasting your time with the wrong guy.''

Dr. Oliver furrowed his brow, piercing Luke with a questioning gaze.  
Luke calmly stuffed a few dollar bills into his wallet and then leaned over the table with a provocative look on his face. ''Richie is not rich anymore.''

''What happened.'' Dr. Oliver sounded irritated as he tried to figure out the piece of information.

''I broke bonds with my father.'' Luke said the provocative tone fading away. ''So if you want money you'll have to go see him but be aware it comes at a price.''  
Luke gathered the newspaper and notes he had spread over the table and got up.  
''I guess we're done then.'' he said turning around to leave.

''But it's your foundation right?'' Dr. Oliver had gotten up as well and was now facing Luke again. There was no way he would let him get away with that little of an explanation.

''Yeah and my father's money.'' Luke began to sound impatient.

''So you really throwing away millions of dollar just because you had a little fight with daddy. You really are stupid.''

''What is so hard to get here? It's not my money to throw away. Yeah big surprise I have lived with the silver spoon in my mouth for a long time and now that I spit it out trying to make it on my own with nothing but my own money suddenly I'm stupid.'' Luke looked at him for a few second and then turned away.  
''You know what? What do I even care? If you want money go see my father.''  
This time Luke rushed right to the door not giving Dr. Oliver a chance to say another thing.

Luke let the door of his apartment fall shut and rushed down the two flights of stairs. As he stepped onto the street his first thought was Java's. There was no way he would start a day like the one ahead without a decent cup of coffee.

When he entered the place a few minutes later the warm sugary smell of coffee wrapped all around his senses and immediately lulled him into a better mood. Since it was sonly 08.30 the business crowd was already gone and the students were not there yet.  
Having the room all to himself Luke picked a seat in the corner and threw his stuff on the table to get comfortable in the large fluffy couch. When he was half way through with his coffee he snapped open his laptop and placed it on his knees. The last week had been really exhausting and he was not nearly half way through his duty plan. He had a busy day ahead with finding a job and taking care of his school application being the top two priorities.

The initial enthusiasm faded away quickly and as the minutes began to drag out to twice their length Luke moved his gaze away from the screen and placed his head in his hands rubbing over his burning eyes.  
Another half an hour later he felt physically and emotionally drained and it was only 10 in the morning. An annoyed sigh on his lips he snapped his laptop shut and silently cursed his inability to write this damn motivation letter.

The rest of the morning was a depressing, nearly humiliating odyssey through several banks and other administrative offices and the fruitless quest for a job. The second half was a little less frustrating but still utterly exhausting and by six in the evening he just wanted to sit down at Java's with nothing but a window to look through and a cup of coffee in his hands.

Due to the after work rush he had to queue quite a long time and when he had finally bought his coffee and sandwich he could not spot a free table by the window so he decided to just turn around and leave.

''Hey Mr. Snyder.''  
Luke turned around and furrowed his brow at the sight of Dr. Oliver sneaking up behind him.

''What do you want.'' His voice sounded resigned and annoyed at the same time.

''You should really sit down to eat. All this self made stress is going to cost you your youth faster than you can watch it happening.''

''I don't need your advice and we don't have to get along anymore since Noah and I broke up so to put it in your words get lost.'' Luke pulled a face and rushed forward to squeeze past the man blocking his way to the door.

''Wow you're even more pouty and whiny than usual. What's the occasion?''

''What do you care?'' Luke moved forward again, another attempt to make his way to the door.

''I'm just asking. Maybe I can help.''

''Like I said you don't have to be nice to me. I don't sit on the money anymore.''

Dr. Oliver tilted his head and eyed him up and down.  
''I know I'm being nice to you cause you look like shit and I know that you like to share what's on your heart so sit down and spill your guts.''

Luke peered at the older man through narrowed eyes.  
He might not have been his first choice for this matter but his life was weighing heavy on him right now and it was true that he would have liked to get rid of some thoughts torturing his mind.  
So he pulled back a chair and dropped down on it exhaling sharply.

''So what is it Mr. Snyder?'' Dr. Oliver sat down across the table and leaned back in his chair looking at him expectantly.

''Everything. There is not one single thing in my life that is working or that I have even remotely under control right now. I mean I just try really hard and everyday seems like a never ending fight and when I look back nothing has really changed and when I look forward I see even more stuff, worse stuff. It's like a bottomless pit and just too much at once but I need to do it all and…''  
Luke paused, his facial expression twitching as he looked down on his hands.

''Why are you doing this?''

''I told you.''

Luke looked back at him shaking his head with disbelief.

''Yeah but you don't do nice. And you know that there is no money to take. So what are you up to?''

''There is nothing on TV and listening to your drama is more interesting than sitting in the dark alone.''

Luke pulled an offended face and leaned back in his chair.  
''Are you making fun of me?''

''No I'm not.'' Dr. Oliver's voice sounded all matter of factly not tainted with any kind of emotion.

''I'm just telling you what this is doing for me. Most people wouldn't admit. They would probably come up with some stupid, obvious, sugar coated lie and tell it right to your face.''

Luke frowned until his eyes were half shut and turned his head slightly towards the side.

''You do know that no human being ever does anything without a personal benefit. Please tell me you're not that naive.''

''That has got nothing to do with naive.'' Luke had gotten over his first surprise and was now darting forward on his chair as he tried to defend his point.

''Yes it has Mr. Snyder. I give you credit for believing in the naturally good human being that tells me you are one of them but sadly so you are walking in very slight company, maybe even alone.''

''Why are you so bitter and misantrophic?''

''I'm not. I'm just too intelligent to be fooled by the masquerade they put up and believe me that's not always funny either. I bet the world is a nicer place seen through your puppy eyes.''

''Are you done?''

Dr. Oliver waved his hand encouragingly.  
''By all means go on.''

''You are really not a friendly person.''

''I'm just not in the position where I have to kiss anybody's ass. I could easily see though why that would annoy people who might not be able to afford that.''

Luke shook his head again crooking up his left cheek.  
''I don't know what to say to that.''

Dr. Oliver waved his hand again nodding his head.  
''Go on spilling your heart. I'm listening.''

Luke remained silent for a while studying the expression on Dr. Oliver's face.

''I don't know where to start. It's really a lot and I just don't know what to do first. I try to get back into school but I am not sure that's going to work for the upcoming academical year… Or ever for that matter.''

Luke took a moment to swallow the pain those words triggered and then sighed out his despair.

''Maybe I have to drop that plan but I'm not ready for that and even worse I have got no backup plan. I don't care about doing some stupid aimless job for the rest of my life. I wanna go somewhere.''

''Then go. If you have a plan in mind there is no reason why you should not go after it until you have what you want.''

''Well that's easy for you to say.''

''No it's not. Do you think I didn't have stones put in my way? What makes you think the road has always been smooth for me?''  
Luke swallowed as he let his gaze travel over the still emotionless face. He pushed his bottom lip forward and slightly tilted his head as his thought began to move into a different direction.

''So what if the road is a little bumpy you just do what you have to do and if you fail you try again. Whining is the only thing that is surely not going to be of any help.''

''You sound so determined. How can you never be insecure?''

''I didn't say that. I just don't let it get to me.''

Luke kept staring at the man sitting across the table his eyes moving quickly along with his thoughts. He just sat there silently for a few moments before he went on.

''I can't find a job. I don't want to sit around doing nothing. It gets me into a strange mood.''

''What is it you want to study?''

Luke's expression changed to surprised at this supposedly irrelevant question.

''Screenwriting. Why.''

''Good.''

Luke shook his head slightly, still expecting an explanation.

''Then write. That should keep you busy till you find a job.''

''I haven't written in a while.''

''Well then it's about time you pick it up again.''

''What about the money? I don't have the financial means anymore to support Noah with his hospital bills.''

''I'll treat him for free.''

''Come again?'' This time Luke's face was more a grimace than just filled with mere surprise.

''Under one condition.''

''Which is?'' Luke looked up dragging out the words.

''You sleep with me.''

The hysterical burst of laughter had come over Luke's lips before his brain had even caught up with the words.  
''Yeah, very funny.'' He now giggled under his breath.'' You know I would not have expected you to have a normal kind of humor.''

''I'm not joking.'' Dr. Oliver had not moved an inch and was still facing Luke with the same matter of factly expression on his face, his voice sounding business as usual.

Luke shook his head, the smile frozen on his lips.

''You're really serious.''

''Yes I am.'' Dr. Oliver had now bent forward and was leaning on the table eyeing him from under quirked eyebrows.

''So are you taking the offer?''

Luke burst into awkward giggling again.

''You can't do that.''

''Well let's see. Considering the fact that you first got dirt on my name, unrightfully. Then blackmailed me after bribing didn't work and then kidnapped me and held me hostage in this terrible brain frying white bread community to perform surgery on your boyfriend I would say we call it even after this one.''

Luke moved his head back a few inches searching his brain for the best answer to this one but there was just nothing he could really think of right there. He looked Dr. Oliver up and down a few more times sure to find the sign that he was joking if he would just look for it careful enough.

''You can't do that. That's blackmail.''

''You know it's really fun to hear you say that Mr. Snyder. And besides it's not. I have all the right in the world to refuse to treat Noah if he can't pay and if I am kind enough to offer you a way out that is actually really nice of me.''

''I'm pretty sure that is illegal on some level.''

Dr. Oliver simply shrugged before he replied.  
''I'm pretty sure if I file a suit for illegal restraint, blackmail and slander you will get about as many years as I will. Don't initiate a game you can't play at Mr. Snyder.''

''Are you doing this to get back at me. Cause if you do it's a pretty cheap shot.''

Dr. Oliver shook his head and leaned forward across the table.  
''I'm doing this because I think you're hot and I have been wanting to get into your pants for a long time now so I'm grabbing an opportunity if it shows.''

Luke still peered at him through sparkling eyes, his lips twitching with the bitter knowledge that the Grimaldi inside him had obviously messed with an equal this time.

''Alright.'' He said trying to keep up a pokerface. ''Talk business then.''


	2. Chapter 2

''So tell me how is this supposed to work?'' Luke leaned a little forward adefiant glare in his eyes.

'' What services exactely do you want me to provide?''he asked , hoping that the sullen choice of words would cover up his insecurity.

''None that you're not willing to provide if that's what's worrying you. This is a business deal not a sexual assault.''

Luke pursed his lips, still not moving in his chair his head tilted and his eyes still asking.

''Have you never… Oh yeah right.''

Luke rolled his eyes at the suggestive undertone in Dr. Oliver's voice.

''Ok I'll explain you how it's done. We have sex twice a week you know how that works right. Same place same time. We meet up there no small talk no flowers or candy. We get naked and we do it. Then each goes his own way and keeps pulling off the day's dutyplan. It's just a purely physical thing with both partners as equals. So you can have your migraine anytime.''

''Where? A hotel.''

''Golly no are you insane? In this town we would not even have the chance to lose the pants before the neighbor squad shows up to stick their nose in. What about your new place do you have a roommate?''

''I live alone.''

''Perfect. Your place it is then. See you tomorrow night at 7.P.M. Mr. Snyder.''

Dr. Oliver gave Luke few seconds to protest and when there was just a nod coming from across the table he got up and reached for his jacket.

Before he turned around to leave he looked down at the table straight into Luke's eyes.

''I must say I'm quite impressed that you can also take it and not only dish it out.''

Luke watched him leave the coffee shop, rolling his eyes at this arguable compliment. After all agreeing to prostitution was not something he would shout proudly from the rooftops.

Luke snapped his laptop shut and pciked up the plate of pasta he had placed on the table just a minute ago. Walking back into the kitchen he placed it in the fridge and poured himself a glass of water instead. Why the hell had he agreed to this. Looking back there was no logical explanation he could think of that would justify doing such a stupid thing. The knowledge that he was in over his head and that he would have paid a high price to get the chanec to back out nagged at him and made him nervous and edgy. As he walked back and forth between the fridge and the kitchentable he let his gaze drop down to his watch. Fifteen more minutes. Let him at least be punctual he thought to himself. Dragging this uncomfortable feeling out was really the last thing he would enjoy.

The sound of the doorbell interrupted his nervous rounds around the apartment just a few minutes later.

Luke cleared his throat and straightened his shouldes as he walked over to get it, swallowing his nervousness and insecurity on the way.

''I only have half an hour until I have to go to a job interview so I would appreciate it if you could hurry.''

Luke had positioned himself in the doorway wearing an annoyed expression. If he had to let Dr. Oliver take this victory then he would at least try to make it as least enjoyable as possible for him.

''Can I come in though? I would hate to do it here on the doorstep.''

Luke twitched his lips and stepped aside, exhaling sharply. Keeping up his let's get over with it attitude he prayed to god that there'd be nothing to give away the fact that he was really scared to death.

''Nice place. A little smaller than the Grimaldi residence.''

''Snyder.'' Luke corrected him keeping up the pouty tone.

''I won't need the guided tour just show me the way to the bedroom would you?''

Once they were inside the bedroom Luke had no idea anymore how to cover his insecurity. He just stood there waiting no clue as to how to start sex without the cuddling.

The kiss hit him by surprise and it made him moan with all the tension he had been keeping inside all day. It was nothing like the kisses he had been used to sharing with Noah. It wasn't tainted with emotions, no heartfelt prelude to lovemaking, just purely physical and purposefull. And he was surprised at how nice a purely sexual kiss could feel.

The touches were new and interesting too. No loving caresses but firm grips into flesh, carrying desire and lust. They were not meant to endear but to heat up and Luke could hardly believe how his body betrayed him by responding to them so quickly.

Before Luke could even get the chance to reach out for buttons and zippers Reid had already undressed them both and led them tot he bed.

Luke was grateful fort he fact that Reid was entirely taking the lead since his mind was to messed up with various emotions to get a grip on any clear thought.

Luke rolled around on his side as he tried to catch his breath. The fact that Dr. Oliver had gotten up right after his climax suited him all too well since it gave him the oppurtunity to turn around and come back to his senses again. His mind was shaken with what had just happened and there was no way he would let him read in his face what an earthshaking orgasm he had just had.

When the waves of pleasure had stopped shaking his body he rolled over again and watched Dr. Oliver fasten his belt and bent down to pick up his shirt.

Luke pushed aside the covers to get dressed as well but Reid just waved his hand for him to stay where he was.

''Don't get up on my account Mr. Snyder. I'll see myself out.'' He picked up his jacket from the floorand was gone before Luke could say anything.


	3. Chapter 3

His eyes burnt into the bright screen Luke kept staring at the blank word document and tried to swallow past the nervous lump stuck in his throat. Every time he stared at the calendar it seemed to get a little bigger and the tension building up inside his chest was almost unbearable at this point. Trying to ease the stinging pain in his neck he closed his eyes and let his head softly roll to the left. While he listened to the gurgling sound of the diswasher he tried to get some pressure away from his mind and take his circling thoughts into another direction.

Of course he could have waited and enrolled for the next academic year but that was just not the way he did it. It would have made him crazy to wait another year, now that he was finally determined he wanted to write again and so he just kept wrenching his brain and guts, convinced that if he just pushed it enough he could get that motivation letter done by the end of the day.

Starting to be annoyed by the aggressive sound of the pen he was tapping onto the top of the wooden table he just threw it away and jumped up from his chair.

The doorhandle was the first thing he could grab as he tripped over one of the large moving boxes in the kitchen. Cursing under his breath he rubbed his aching wrist and walked over to the fridge.

He quickly poured himself a glass of Coke and leaned against the kitchen counter to empty it. Try as he might there was just no way he could get a grip on his thoughts. They were just going into too many diferent directions and to be honest he was not even sure he knew what he was think about at all. Too many things to worry about. Too many impressions.

About half an hour later he was finally half way through the first pargraph of his letter and out of idea what to say.

,Just screw it' he mumbled and snapped his laptop shut to reach for the newspaper instead.

Going over the highlighted job ad's once more he shook his head. Half of them were useless and he would not even have to call. Obviously he had been a little to optimistic this morning. Anyway he could still write the application for the rest of them and patiently wait for the 'We're sorry you were not selected for the position letter,

When he finally heard the sound of the doorbell and he put his work away with a few hasty movements and got up to get it.

They exchanged the usual greetings and walked straight over to the bedroom without any further small talk. Today Luke was grateful for the fact that no talking was required and he wasn't nearly as hesitant as the first time they had done this. The kiss was demanding and loaded with sexual desire just like the ones before and Luke kissed back fiercely, wanting to lose himself in this simple, so real feeling.

They stripped each out of his own clothes and Luke reached out to grab Dr. Oliver's neck. For a brief instant he held on to the blond hair while he kisses him. Then he began to slide his palms over the naked skin, around both shoulder and further down. The movement was sudden and forceful and Luke opened his eyes in a mix of surprise and shock as Dr. Oliver grabbed his wrists holding them down at a distance with a firm grip.

''Don't touch my back.'' he said his eyes piercing Luke's.

Luke held his gaze as he twitched his lips and swallowed. He just nodded slightly and felt a little sting of disappointment in the pit of his stomach as Dr. Oliver loosened his grip around his wrists.

Luke brought his hands up again to entwine them with the blonde strands and leaned in for another kiss.

The next thing he felt was his back hitting the mattress and his body being covered with the delicious weight of another one. He was caught between the soft fabric of the sheets and the warm glowing skin covering his own from shoulder to ankles. Luke slung both his arms around the broad shoulders above him in a desperate attempt to pull this wonderful wrap of heat and safety yet closer.

Like the first time they had had sex there was not much of a foreplay and by the time Dr. Oliver shifted out of the embrace to look at him Luke's whole body was quivering with blind want and sexual urges.

''I want to fuck you.''

The words were spoken in a husky, rushed voice and the most promising thing Luke had ever heard.

Again he just briefly nodded his head and leaned over to reach for the drawer. He placed both the lube and the condom on the exposed sheets between them and rolled over on his stomach.

It had been too long since he had had someone move inside his body and the intensity of the sensation nearly made him sob with relief. Squeezing his eyes shut he rested his spinning head against the mattress and just enjoyed the most real thing he had felt in weeks. Through his own pleading moans he heard himself urging Dr. Oliver to go faster and harder and he just wanted to lose himself to this moment. All that mattered right now were the thrusts that filled his whole body, the nails digging into the skin of his shoulders and their moaning that filled the hot air around them.

Just like the time before. Dr. Oliver only briefly caught his breath after he came andthen immediately turned around to the other side again to get up. Luke dropped himself on his back breathing out all of the tension and pressure along with the waves of satisfaction that were moving down his spine. He felt his body sink deeper into the mattress with every breath and his mind was only pleasure and satisfaction.

Listening to Dr. Oliver getting dressed he crawled up against the warm spot on the sheets and wrapped the cover around his body.

''I know the way out. See you on Friday.'' The words reached Luke's mind through the building dizziness of sleep and a smile appeared on his lips as he drifted away into his slumber entirely.


	4. Chapter 4

''Luuuuke!''

At first Reid's mind didn't even want to process the intrusive noise but the sound was just too persistent and shrill to ignore. Before he could even open his mouth to complain Luke had already pulled away and was balancing on his knees, tumbling to get off the mattress and on his feet.

''Hold on.'' he said as he reached for his shirt, slipped it on and walked over to the French window.

''What the fuck?'' Reid was now propped up on his elbows watching the scene incredulously.

''What is it?'' he heard Luke yelling and as he stretched over to the side he saw him leaning onto the rail of the small balcony.

''What are you doing? '' A giddy female voice rang from what he guessed the balcony below.

''Just chilling.''

''We're watching the Academy Award Special I told you about last night. Are you coming down?''

''Nah I'm not in the mood today. Thanks though. Go ahead watch it without me.''

''But you'll miss it then.''

''Doesn't matter.''

The female voice argued a bit more and after they had settled that it_ did_ not matter Luke walked back inside, pulling the curtains shut behind him.

''What the hell was that?'' Dr. Oliver was staring at him through narrowed eyes, a seriously intrigued expression spreading on his face.

''That was Laura. She lives downstairs.''

''Are you kidding me?''

Luke just shook his head as he started to peel out of his clothes again.

''It might sound a bit weird to you but some people actually do get along with others. Or hang out with them for that matter.'' He tossed his jeans aside and kneeled on the mattress again, crawling closer to the half naked body on his bed.

''You are really weird.'' Dr. Oliver shook his head, true disbelief ringing in his voice.

''Well that's my mind. But it's my body that you want right? So be my guest.''

Luke licked his lips and laid back on the sheets, his arms stretched above his head, letting his legs fall open in a provocatively slow way.

Dr. Oliver pursed his lips and drew in a sharp breath. The kid began to take way too much pleasure in this game for his liking. He released the tension in his shoulders and blew the air out of his lungs again with a bit too much pressure.

Obviously Luke Snyder was familiar with the concept of the submissive being the one in control.

If he didn't watch it this kid would find a way to turn the tables around on him again.

Never judge a book by its cover Reid lectured himself as he stretched out over the length of Luke's body. Scanning the angelic face with the innocent features, his gaze remained glued to the glistening lips and a suggestive smile. Licking his own lips he moved his gaze up to eye level again. And he was not sure he had ever seen such a come on look on the face of any of his previous much more experienced lovers.

Thinking back, the strange pleasure Luke had seemed to be taking in blackmailing and holding him hostage could have given away the sexual predator slumbering inside him.

After a kiss that quickly got out of his control Reid found himself on his back and Luke was on his knees licking his way down to his hips. With one quick movement he got rid of the pants in his way and Reid just had enough time to catch up on what was happening.

Forget about it he though and reached down for Luke's shoulders to pull him away but then those lips were on his skin already. Not soft or tentative. He had wrapped them all around his erection, slid halfway down and sucked almost painfully as he pulled his head back again.

Instead of pushing him away Reid's fingernails dug into the soft skin indifferent to the pain it might cause.

He could feel a slight flinching followed by a moan of pleasure and then he let go of Luke's shoulders and threw his head back on the pillow. Knowing exactly what Luke was up to, he clenched a fistful of the sheets with both hands and sucked his bottom lip into his mouth.

Five minutes into the well elaborated teasing feast he was sure he could taste blood but there was no way only the hint of a pleading would cross those lips. When he finally came he wasn't sure what he'd screamed but by that time he did not care anymore.

As he opened his eyes again he saw Luke looking at him, waiting for his gaze to focus. Only then he swallowed demonstratively and leaned in for another messy kiss, mingling the taste of semen on his tongue with the subtle taste of iron on Reid's bottom lip. Desperately sucking the hot, soft muscle into his mouth Reid flipped them around again and forced Luke's legs apart with his right thigh.

Reluctantly he pulled away from the kiss and slid every finger of his right hand past the slick, parted lips. Spreading the saliva over his palm he reached down between their hips and began to stroke Luke at a furious pace, watching his features change with the building climax. Luke sure enjoyed giving it but apparently he enjoyed getting it still a bit more.

He took another few seconds to watch the expression of sexual abandon playing around those innocent features and then closed his eyes to just listen to the lust filled moans. Normally he would have liked to drag it out too but right now he just wanted to make him come and afterwards watch him as he tried to hide how much he'd liked it.

''What's wrong?'' Luke propped up on his elbow as he heard Dr. Oliver cursing while picking up his clothes.

''I'm running late. I was going to pick up take away on the way to the hospital but I guess that's cancelled now.''

''I was about to put some leftovers into the microwave.'' Luke pushed the covers aside and reached down to pick up his jeans from the floor.

''There's enough for two. Be my guest.'' Luke reached for his shirt and walked over to the kitchen without waiting for an answer.

Luke sat straight on his chair, his fork hovering between the plate and his mouth as he watched the older man eating. He had sure seen people eating fats but this was something else. Not only did he pick up huge bits but Luke was not even sure he chewed at all before he swallowed.

''You know what.'' Dr. Oliver began with his mouth full, chasing some of the pasta over the plate with his hectic fork movements.

''Don't buy those anymore they can't be picked up fast enough.''

Just two minutes later he jumped up from the chair and headed for the door still chewing.

''Thanks for the food. See you on Monday.''


	5. Chapter 5

**I know it has been ages since I have updated but I have always wanted to finish this story. **

** Now I finally have a little bit of time on my hands again so I thought I'll give it a try.**

**''**Dammit'' Luke dropped the pen and stared down at his wrist. It was really 6 PM already.

''Fuck.'' he cursed again as he stumbled up from the kitche table to finally get the door.

Without bothering about much of a greeting Reid walked past Luke directly into the kitchen.

''Oh come on Snyder.'' The words came out in a questioning, unbelieving tone as he pointed his head towards the bottle of vodka standing on the table.

''Just mind your own business will you?'' Luke tried to get the words past his lazy tongue and stretched to pick up the glass.

On his way to the sink he emptied it in one draw and then placed it down in slow motion.

Reid shook his head as he watched him open the fridge and put the bottle away as well.

''By all means suit yourself I won't stand in the way of your suicide. As long as you have enough grip on your senses to perform a blowjob I'm good.''

''You're really an ass.''

''What? '' This time the tone was flat and serious.

''What did you expect me to do now? Throw you a little pity party, do you think that's gonna make things any better?''

''Do you even care about other people at all?'' Luke looked at Reid, his face a mixture of offended and uncomprhensive.

''If you ask this seriously, that shows me you do not have the slightest idea about the concept.''

Luke looked at him through narrow eyes now obviously confused.

Clearly that kid hat no idea what he was talking about. Maybe it was the drinks, maybe he had really no idea after all he was barely twenty.

'' Snyder,'' Reid paused for a moment making sure he had Luke's attention before he went on.

''You have no idea how efficient you can support a persons downfall by showing too much understanding. So you think I should tell you what now? That I understand this? That I think it is a good idea to solve your problems by drinking yourself into a renal failure coma? That you are sucha poor soul and encourage you to feel sorry for yourself? That is for people who _really_ don't give a damn or who put their own narcissistic urge to please above their friends needs.''

Luke looked at him his face twitching as he tried to decide whether he was outraged or offended but soon enough the words had mingled with the soft void in his mind so he just stayed motionless, his face still a questioning frown.

''Come on Snyder let's get naked. I have a surgery at seven.''

While he talked Reid had already reached down to unbottun his shirt and when he laid Luke down on the bed he had already stripped out off his jeans as well.

Luke felt his back hit the mattress and then skilled hands move over buttons and zippers to get him out of his clothes. The thick glow in his veins was spreading with every heartbeat and made everything happen in slow motion. The tipsy feeling made him overly receptive for any kind of stimulation and it took barely a minute until his naked body had adapted to Reid's movements. Quickly they were joined in a familiar routine of touches and kisses.

The velvet heat of Reid's tongue in his mouth had felt good before but tonight it felt like a lifeline. Tonight Luke wanted this to last forever, never wanted to leave those arms that held him in such a firm, unshakable grip.

_Don't leave me,_ he breathed wordlessly as he clung to the broad shoulders inches away from his quivering body.

By now he knew the way Reid would touch him and every single move he made, every shifting position was only meant to meet those touches and feel them one second earlier, one second longer.

,,Let go. Let go Luke I've got you.''

The words were suddenly echoing through Luke's head and he didn't know whether it was Reid who had whispered them against his hair or whether he was just thinking them.

But Reid's arms were wrapped tight around his body. He was holding him closely against his heaving chest, their heartbeat racing against each other. So he let go and he buried his face in the crook of Reid's neck as relief washed over him. The tears started flowing without effort, just one merely perceptible sob after he regained his breath.

His face was buried against warm, sweaty skin and the tears kept coming, out of his control. The salty liquid left a hot trail as it ran down, dripping from his cheek onto Reid's shoulder.

Reid's arms were still wrapped around his back and he held him wordlessly, though Luke could have sworn he felt his lips moving against his ear.

When he woke up Luke's head felt surprisingly void. A sense of warmth and light was lingering in his chest and he could breathe easily and deeply. With a slow, lazy effort he rolled over to reach for the digital clock on the nightstand.

8.37 PM

The twilight sky was already turning into deep dark and Luke had to lit the bedside lamp to get up. While he felt around the nightstand for the switch his hand was grazed by a small piece of paper. From the distance he could recognize Reid's handwriting on it and he quickly grabbed it to read.

_You were lucky to get a second don't gamble for a third._

For a while he just stared down at the small note and finally he walked over to the bathroom, the piece of paper still in his hand. Before he turned on the water of the shower he carefully pinned it to the mirror.

At first it felt like thousands of small nails hitting his skin but the longer the water kept running the better his thoughts moved through his brain again. With his eyes closed he turned around to move his face under the stream of cool water.

Slowly clarity came back to his senses and right at its heel the cold sting of embarrassment. What did Reid think of him now, that he was a spoiled childish brat, that he wasn't capable of dealing with his problems in a more mature way then that?

Was he?

One thing he was sure about was that he did not want to be one of those old worn out wrecks that would never learn and were caught between self pity, regrets and shame. But if he knew this if he was so sure about it how could it still be so hard to say no to a drink when he felt he really needed one. Why was his willpower not enough?


	6. Chapter 6

Luke dragged himself up the stairs holding on to the handrail as he did. This was the third time this week he had barely made it up the stairs to his apartment and also the third time

he had cursed himself for taking this job at 'Amy's 50's roller disco and diner'. Of course the roller skates had flashed a red warning light inside his head but then again it had also been the tenth job

interview in that week and Amy had been the first one looking like she was even thinking about hiring him.

He tried not to think too much about how less flattering that was and tried to focus on the full fridge instead.

''Oh come on.'' Luke whined as he heard the sound of the key hitting the ground.

With an annoyed sigh het let his bag slide from his shoulder and tried to reach down on the floor without flexing his back.

''What the hell are you doing?''

Luke turned around instinctively his face twitching at the sharp pain in his shoulder.

,, You look awful, did you catch a beating?'' Dr. Oliver was standing right behind him checking him, a weird look on his face.

''It's from work.'' Luke snapped, pointing his head towards the key.

''Would you mind?''

Reid bent down and slid the key into the doorlock.

''No seriously what happened.''he asked as they stepped inside the corridor.''

''Work.''

''What the hell do you work?''

''You don't wanna know.'' Luke aimed his bag at the couch and walked back towards the corridor.

''Yes I do!''

''A roller disco and diner.'' Luke said rolling his eyes.

Dr. Oliver remained silent for a few second eying Luke up and down with his left eybrow quirked.

''You're not kidding.'' He finally stated with a crooked grin.

''I wish I was.'' Luke lifted one hand up to his shoulder, rubbing the aching muscles in the crook of his neck.

,,Lose the shirt I'll give you a massage.''

''Really?''

''Of course. I came here to get off not to watch you lie on the couch suffering and whining.''

''I should have know.'' Luke smiled as he pulled the T- shirt over his head on the way to te bedroom.

Luke shrugged at the cool oil dripping onto his back but when it was spread with slow, careful movements it quickly turned into a warm velvety film between his skin and the palm of Reid's hand.

The pressure applied was light and even, flat hands roaming over the total of his back. Luke felt his shoulders slowly unclench and sink into the mattress. The gentle touches went on for a short while until he felt a thumb being pressed into hard flesh.

''Dammit.'' He cursed against the mattress under his face.

Reid continued to work the sore muscles, now using the heel of his right hand to apply even more pressure.

''You have to lean forward a little when you skate. And when you put down the plates on the table flex your knees instead of leaning over.''

Luke lifted his head sidewards quirking and eyebrow over his shoulder.

''You know how to wait tables in skates?''

''I know how the human body works.''

Luke smiled over his shoulder trying to lift his head up further. He was pretty sure that knowledge had been put through the test and the picture that now appeared before his mind made the smile grow even bigger.

''Ouch.'' Luke winced at the sudden flash of pain shooting through his left shoulder.

Reid had taken the thumbs away from his neck and was now pushing him down against the mattress with his flat palms.

''Face down and lie still Snyder.''

,,You like ordering people around in the bedroom.'' Luke had turned his head again and was looking at him with a teasing smile.

''Not just there. Now shut up and stop moving all the time.''

It was a while until the massage was actually enjoyable but once his muscles had loosened up it turned into a wonderful sensation.

Warm hands were moving flat against his back now and the way the slid up and down along his spine making him feel warm and tingly.

Outside the window the trees were shaking and clouds started covering the grey sky.

There was surely going to be rain tonight and Luke was glad he did not have to leave his flat anymore.

With a content smile on his lips he closed to enjoy the feeling of Reid's hands on his body.

His fingers were now lingering on the small of his back and the little sparks they triggered began to fill him up with a sweet and sticky tiredness.

Through the tilted window he could hear the distant noises of a nearby street but inside the room it was totally quiet. Against the matress he heard his own breathing

and occaisonally the sound of Reid shifting his position.

''Better?''

The word floated into his mind and he felt the sheets rub against his cheek as he nodded.

''Turn around.'' Reid wiped the palm of his hands against his jeans.

Luke rolled on his back, watching Reid as he opened his shirt one button at a time, his eyes still locked with Luke's.

When he was done he let it fall silenty on the carpet floor and reached down to undo Luke´s pants.

His eyes still locked with the blue ones above him Luke lifted up his hips and shifted out of them.

They fell beside the shirt, the heavy denim and the beltbuckle causing a soft thud.

Reid bent down for a kiss and the fabric of his pants felt strangely exciting against Lukes naked body.

Suddenly he felt a twitching inside his stomach and he had to reach both hands out for Reid's hair trying to pull him impossibly closer. The desire rose inside him so quickly that he felt he could never let it out fast enough. Even though he was still feeling a little dazed from the massage his heart began to race furiously against his ribcage and the pressure would only fade as he sucked the soft muscle of Reid's tongue deep into his own mouth.

The vibration of a surprised moan shot down his body right under the sole of his bare feet where it kept sparkling.

'Reid' he wanted to whisper, but something told him to hold back and so he bit his lower lip hoping the flash of pain would bring back part of his senses but instead it made him feel even wilder. Reid had moved away from his neck and was now kissing him again, running his tongue over the throbbing bit of skin Luke's teeth had just bitten on.

''Oh fuck.'' Luke mumbled the words into Reid's mouth before he had to pull away to take a deep breath.

'' I will.'' Reid ran his thumb over the glistening lips and then briefly slid it inside the slick hotness before he got up to get rid of his pants.

On his way back he reached out for the bedside lamp, switching it on when he stretched out over Luke's body again.

''There is no way I will miss that look on your face.''

Luke's gaze shifted up, taking in the sight of Reid hovering above him. The muscles of his chest and stomach were well defined and his lean hips just an inch away from Luke`s. His skin was glowing in the weak shine of the bedside lamp and his pupils were dilated, giving his eyes a dark glow.

Reid kept looking at him, locking their eyes,making sure he would not turn his gaze away before he reached down palming Luke's erection with his right hand.

The deep sigh came right from his core and Luke fisted the sheets beneath him to stop himself from moaning Reid's name.

His eyes had fallen shut automatically but he could still feel Reid's gaze glued to him and so he struggled to open them again.

Reid had leaned in and shifted their bodies to the right so that his chest was entirely covering Luke's. He could feel a strong, slow heartbeat against his shoulder and while he was already breathing erratically he wondered how Reid's features could still look so stoic.

His lips were only slightly parted and his eyes were so blue. God did he have beautiful lashes.

Luke tried to remain focused on the sight, his eyelids fluttering as his breathing became more and more labored. Only when he could not take it anymore he let his head fall back and finally closed his eyes.

Reid moved closer up Luke's body adjusting to his movement until his lips were just an inch away from Luke's. He stopped his slow strokes for a moment and waited for Luke to look at him.

''What do you crave for?'' he asked, his voice low and steady.

''What do you want to feel?''

Luke wanted to answer but his brain was a pool of lust and mush and he could not move his tongue in any way to speak.

''Tell me Luke what do want me to do?''

Luke was sure he could speak now but when he parted his lips his mouth suddenly went dry and the heavy breathing would just not stop.

''I..'' he had to pause and exhale deeply when Reid's hand moved between his legs again, wrapping around his erection, his thumb stretching out to graze this forbidden orifice.

''God Reid...''

Reid leaned in closer, dipping his slick tongue into Luke's mouth. Before Luke could claim the kiss he pulled back again and shifted his gaze up, his blue eyes slowly appearing beneath the heavy eyelashes.

''Tell me.'' He whispered again, his own longing shining through his voice.

''I want to feel you inside me in every way possible.''

''I want to feel your tongue deep in my mouth and you buried inside me while I come.''

Reid's lips briefly grazed his again and Luke hissed up starving for that kiss but Reid had already withdrawn again and so had his hand between Luke's legs.

Luke whimpered involuntarily as he felt the craving clench around his guts. The air against his chest felt cold and intrusive and he sigh with relief when his body was finally wrapped in warmth and lust again.

Reid had already opened the foil of the condom and now expertly popped open the lube with his left hand.

''Put this on me.'' he whispered as he handed Luke condom and shifted on his back.

With a slightly unsteady hand Luke did as he was told and then reached for the lube lying on the sheet beside them.

His wrist was grabbed firmly and Reid's lips were moving seductively slow as he ordered him to lie down on his back.

This time Luke did not manage to keep his eyes open his eyes again once they had fallen shut. The first thing he felt was the cool, sticky liquid being spread over him.

First several fingers, and then just a thumb drawing circles around that sensitive, forbidden spot on his sensation made him feel shaky with need and that tiny hint of shame he still felt whenever somebody touched him there.

But the way Reid did it with so much self awareness, such confidence it really felt meant to be.

Slowly Reid's hand moved over to his hip bone and then down his right leg and when Reid finally lifted it up on his shoulder Luke could feel his heart beating in his throat.

As soon as Reid started to move inside him everything else around them slowly went out of focus until Luke was caught in that perfect world where there was just him and this man that could take him to heights he had never experienced before. It almost made his heart ache that this moment had to go by and he instinctively tightened his grip around the broad shoulders above him.

Reid's face was just inches away from his own and when he could tell Luke was close, he leaned down for a messy kiss, biting down on soft lips and then sucking them inside his mouth.

Luke felt the orgasm build around the base of his spine and then Reid's tongue snaked past his lips again, snuggling against his own, sucking and licking, the sparks rushing through his limbs like liquid fire . Luke dug his fingers into hot skin as he struggled not to break this sweetest and deepest kiss he had ever felt. Only when he was dizzy with a lack of oxygen he pulled away and let his chest sink down with a desperate sigh.

''Oh Fuck.'' Still breathing heavily, he buried his face against the crook of Reid's neck, his lips sticking to the sweaty skin.

Through a fog of satisfaction and bliss he could feel Reid moving inside him another few seconds and then collapsing on top of him, glowing skin covering his chest.

Luke still felt like he was walking on clouds when he placed the plates on the table.

He walked back to the kitchen counter to grab the cheese and then sat down across Reid who had already started eating.

''These are much better.'' He stated and nodded towards the pasta on his plate.

''It does not take me an eternity to pick them up.''

''You're easily pleased.'' Luke smirked as he cut of a slice of cheese.

'' Well wait until I ask you to give me a blow job next week.'' Reid was talking with his mouth full and already grabbed the next bite of food.

Luke lowered his gaze just a little bit. Somehow it still made him feel a little awkward to treat the subject in such a defying way.

They ate mostly in silence and then suddenly it felt so natural to ask and Luke put down his fork looking directly at the man across the table.

''Reid?''

''Mmh?''

Reid kept picking up food just briefly lifting his gaze up from his plate.

''What about the scar on your back? ''

''How do you know? '' He dropped his fork on the plate and he looked over at Luke through pinched eyes.

''Well I was bound to find out sometime.''

''It's none of your business so forget about it again.'' Reid picked up his fork and went on with his meal.

''I just wanted to ask…''

''Didn' I tell you to mind your own business ?'' the impatient tone could have been a warning to Luke but instead he went right for the next question.

''Why do you want nobody to know?''

''Because I want to forget about it.''Reid's tone was calm but clearly the last warning to back off.

''What happened?'' Luke looked at him with mix of concern and expectation never minding the warning.

''Reid I know what scar that is.''

''For god´s sake we are fucking what makes you think I will tell you my life story?''

Reid got up from the table and grabbed his jacket from the chair behind him.

Before he walked out of the kitchen he paused and looked down at Luke to make sure he had his attention.

''Now listen carefully I have invited myself into your bed, not _you_ into my _life_. I like to fuck you because you are hot and that is all there is to it.

I have no clue when you thought this had turned into a romance novel but you better get that idea out of your head fast. ''


	7. Chapter 7

Half jogging Luke tumbled around the corner of Java's, balancing two take away mugs in his hands. He should just have taken the bus. When he had asked Reid to pick him up in the town centre, his first words had been: ,, At least bring me a coffee then.'' followed by ,, And you better not be late!''

Now he was. Almost ten minutes to be precise. He slowed down a little to confirm by looking down at his watch, well nine. Before he switched back to running he took a sip out of each coffee mug, discovering that the content of the right one tasted way better, the perfect combination of sweet from the syrup and bitter from the coffee.

When he had to stop at the crosswalk Luke immediately noticed the empty spot where Reid's car was supposed to be standing. Besides him, there was only one young girl waiting at the traffic lights, her MP3 plugged into her ears. Apart from them the street was empty.

When he moved forward to cross to the other side Luke had to pinch his eyes at the red evening sun reflecting from a glazed building. He sat down on a low moss covered wall to get the sun out of his view.

He had barely settled when saw Reid's car turn around the corner, pulling up on the street right in front of his feet.

"You're late." Luke said and he gave Reid a reproachful look, grinning inwardly.

''I know.'' He simply stated as he reached out for the coffee.

Luke squeezed into the passenger seat and then turned around, making sure he was handing over the left coffee mug. The ride to his apartment was barely ten minutes and neither of them spoke, each busy with his own thoughts.

Reid parked his car in the usual spot right in front of Luke's building and then silently followed him up the stairs. Leaning back against the wall, he watched Luke run his hands over his body searching every single pocket for his keys. He was wearing jeans, a grey T-shirt and a light jacket, the look Reid loved so much on him. It was that hot look that emphasized his youth and innocence and made Reid want to devour him then and there.

He knew it was cheap but it was this innocence he wanted to spoil. It turned him on to relish in the feeling of seeing him dirty and needy, the feeling of claiming his young, almost untouched flesh and tainting it with his dirty desires.

Even though he would never admit that to himself, Luke had managed to get a strange control over him. He had it by simply standing there opening a front door, looking so hot. From the first time he had laid eyes upon this spoiled kid he had wanted him and with every time he showed up he had driven him increasingly insane with lust and hunger. But there was also something else, something that was different about him, something that made his guts ache with pure need. There was something about this kid that filled a spot inside him.

As soon as the door was finally opened Reid pushed them both through the small gap and kicked the door shut with his foot. He kept leading their steps, walking them both towards the wall inside the corridor and then backed Luke up against it, pressing into him with his whole body, crushing their lips together in a feverish kiss.

Even though taken by surprise, Luke's body barely needed seconds to react and his hands instinctively went to Reid's hips tugging the shirt out of his pants. His body had gotten used to those touches so much and worked merely by instinct whenever they were together.

Struggling to move within the little space available, Luke grinded his body against Reid's still tugging at whatever piece of clothes he could reach, desperate to get all of them off. He managed to squeeze his hands in between them and undo both their belts. Reid then took a step forward moving their hips even closer together. With one hand he grabbed Luke's wrists and pinned them down above his head. He knew he could move one of his hands away again. Luke loved him doing this and he would not put up a struggle. The way Luke could give himself just simply made drove him wild.

Reid placed this free hand around Luke's neck and remained still for a while, staring down into his eyes - eyes dark with desire, open like a book, looking back up at him through those beautiful long lashes.

Reid licked his lips and he saw Luke's gaze drop as he did. Luke's eyes remained on his wet lips and he licked them again, then parted them and looked down at Luke's in turn. They were glistening with saliva as well and they were slightly parted, glowing red already. Reid shifted his gaze up again, searching for Luke's. When their eyes were locked he looked at him for a while and then leaned in to kiss him hard and long. Luke responded to the kiss by moaning deeply into his mouth, and writhing under his body, creating this sweet friction in all the right places.

Before he could get too lost in the sensation, Reid started walking them towards the bedroom, unbuttoning his shirt on the way. He pushed Luke back until his legs hit the edge of the bed and then sat him down on it, his hands pushing down his shoulders, lips reluctantly tearing away from Luke's.

Within seconds he was completely undressed and he kneeled down beside Luke's body pulling of jeans and boxers. Tugging hurriedly he moved Luke's shirt over his head and then stretched out over his naked body. Kissing was definitely not enough to satisfy this smoldering desire inside him and so Reid shifted them, roaming his hands over Luke's body wherever he could reach. Luke kept moving underneath him, trying to give him better access. He was breathing heavily and every move he made was aimed to tug Reid closer towards him or grind against his body.

Reid knew his fingers were leaving marks all over Luke's body and he knew it had to hurt; and he wanted it too.

_You're mine._ He thought as he licked his way down Luke's chest and shifted to kneel between his thighs. _Your body belongs to me._

Luke kept bucking his hips, hoping to get to the pleasure as fast as he could but Reid had planned to take his sweet time and Luke already knew it. He sighed again desperate and needy as he felt Reid fingers digging deeper into the flesh just above his hipbones.

Reid had flattened his hands now, placing both palms over bruised skin and slowly leaned forward to blow a brush of air into the direction of Luke's crotch. Luke exhaled sharply and his moaning had turned into whimpering now. Reid leaned yet forward until his lips were almost touching him and then blew out another brush of hot air. Without delay he leaned in all the way and placed a few merely perceptible kisses on warm skin, moving down and then licking one flat long trail all the way up until he pulled away again, leaving Luke whimpering with disapproval.

Reid moved back until he was sitting on his heels. He released his grip on Luke's hips and then ran one hand down his thighs, moving as slowly as he could manage without losing his own temper. Luke reached out for his hand trying to guide it where he really wanted it but Reid knew that and he would just let him get so close and then pull it away, sliding it down to Luke's knees or ankles. Luke began to move impatiently, spreading his legs yet further and trying to get hold of Reid's shoulders to guide him.

When he felt Reid's breath against his cock again he dropped his arms back on the mattress and let his head fall back, eyes closed.

Slowing down even further Reid place one hand on Luke's stomach and the other just above the base of his cock, his thumb remaining within reach to trail off occasionally. Ignoring the pleading sounds beneath him he started to lick and suck on the sensitive area under Luke's navel. Then, with one fluid motion he twisted his head and took him inside his mouth until he was halfway down.

Luke breathed out through his nose almost tripping over his own breath. He tried to raise his hips to burry himself deeper but they were pinned against the mattress again. Instead he clenched the sheets left and right of his body and tossed his head to the side. Reid pursed his lips, creating strong suction for just a few seconds, his wet mouth sliding down inch by inch and then he pulled back all the way, his lips lingering just above the top.

''Come on.'' Luke begged through clenched teeth as he rocked against Reid's mouth.

But Reid took his mouth away and moved both his hands off Luke's hip, along the inner side of his thighs and around his ass, his right thumb sneaking almost close enough to press against Luke's opening. Luke moaned loudly not sure in which direction to shove his hips to finally get touched or sucked.

"Come on." He breathed again. His voice almost wrecked.

Reid remained completely motionless for a second and then slid his hands back up to Luke's hipbone, taking him inside his mouth all the way, his saliva coated lips easily sliding down Luke's soft, warm skin.

Luke let out a guttural groan very close to a plaintive cry and his hands immediately darted out to Reid's shoulders grabbing the flesh hard, desperate to keep him in place this time. He dug his fingers into the strong muscles, biting his lips as Reid finally began to suck him off. His tongue was moving gently against his skin in sharp contrast to the lips that were squeezing him fiercely.

''God dammit.'' Reid heard Luke curse against the pillow and he had to concentrate hard to keep up what he was doing. He felt the pressure in his stomach grow agonizingly strong and it did not take long until he was unable to go on. He had to have him now. He needed to be inside him, needed to drive into this body that robbed him of all his common sense. He flicked his tongue forward one last time, keeping up the suction as he pulled away and then with one swift move he grabbed Luke's body, quivering with need, limps soft and weightless, and flipped him over.

In a frenzy of lust and craving, almost burning his insides he ripped the foil of the condom open with his teeth and halfheartedly rushed through the preparations. Undoubtedly too quickly but he didn't care. His brain had gone into shutdown a long while ago and all he could think about was the hot deep feeling of being buried inside Luke's body, feeling him rock back into his thrusts.

When he was done he grabbed Luke's hips recklessly and his brain almost kicked in again when he heard him groan with pain and skip one or two breaths. But then he felt Luke's hand reaching back for him, tugging on his hips, urging him on.

"Yes," he heard him whimper and just that one word turned his brain into mush.

Reid reached his right arm up, wrapping it all the way around Luke's shoulders to keep him steady. With his free hand he grabbed Luke's right leg under his knee, pushing it up so he could pound even deeper inside of him. He slid his hand off Luke's knee and lazily wrapped it around his erection.

Luke immediately started rocking back and forth between Reid's hips and his fist, urging him on with pleading whimpers and Reid obliged, picking up pace and strength so fast he felt the sweat dripping from his forehead.

Luke threw his head back, his neck exposed like prey and Reid felt his instincts rage inside him. With a guttural moan he stretched his body forward and bit down hard on the soft skin, timed perfectly with one particularly deep stroke and Luke made a sound that tore his insides apart.

_I own you._ Reid thought again and he squeezed his eyes shut rocking his hips yet faster and pulling Luke's body back against his own with his left arm. When he felt Luke was close he took his hand away from his cock sliding it up his chest and underneath his cheek so he could turn his face and look at him. His eyes were squeezed shut, eyelashes painting soft shadows on his flushed cheeks. His lips were swollen and deep red, parted and occasionally closing down around the tip of his tongue that darted out to wet them.

It was this total abandonment to his feelings, the desperate need he let show without holding anything back. The way he fearlessly let himself go, giving himself with that confidence of an innocent soul; that was it. That was what he wanted to suck out of him. He needed it, needed the sight of Luke coming undone in his arms, he needed it more than anything and he would have taken the possibility to wallow in the sight of Luke coming, over an orgasm of his own anytime.

When he felt his heart beginning to shatter at the sight he turned his head away, burying his face in Luke's hair, moaning deeply as they both climaxed just seconds apart from each other.

When Reid came out of the bathroom minutes later, Luke was already fully dressed. He had sat down in a large, fluffy, armchair and was leafing through some hardcover book.

''So what are we going to have for diner?'' Reid looked up from buttoning his shirt.

''Are you kidding?''

''Why?'' He still looked at Luke, a little surprised by that answer.

''Well if you think this is a Fuck-in with a joint restaurant then you better get this idea right out of your head - if I quote correctly.''

Luke glanced up from his lecture a tiny smile gracing his lips.

''God you're sensitive Snyder.''

,,No.'' Luke's tone was still matter-of-factly, strangely unmoved. With a light bounce he got up from the chair and walked forward until he was almost standing on Reid's toes.

''No. I am not sensitive Reid I am just not willing to take any more of your crap. So I asked about your private life. Big deal!'' Luke pulled a mocking face as he went on.

''What did you think I was going to do next, propose? ''

Reid opened his mouth wanting to answer but Luke cut him off right away.

''Why do you always have to act like it is such a pitiable thing to share one's life? Well, what is so bad about being human like everyone else, what makes you so special? What makes you better than anyone else Reid Oliver? ''

Luke kept staring at him, his almost black eyes reflecting the sparkles from the bedside lamp. Reid parted his lips but before he could speak Luke had picked up his monologue again

''It might be a big surprise to you but I really don't care whether you just come here, get off and get lost. For all that I care you don't even have to greet next time. I will not bother to ask anything again and - no I have not forgotten that this is a fucking deal. But guess what that goes both ways. If I had to blackmail people to get into their pants I would tread carefully!''

''Are you finished?'' Reid looked at him, staring right into his eyes, waiting for his next move.

Luke just held the gaze, staring back, his eyes glued to Reid's.

''I donated.''

''What?'' Luke's features immediately changed to confused.

,,My kidney. I donated it. ''Reid was still looking at him, his face stoic.

''To whom?'' Luke instinctively took a step forward.

''My mother. She was an alcoholic. Well, actually both my parents were. Only she was much more miserable than him yet. She was anorexic as well and I gave her my kidney 15 years ago because it was the only chance to save her life.''

Luke looked at him, not sure what to say next, his features concerned and perplexed.

Without any further explanation Reid finally turned away and left Luke standing in the middle of the bedroom.

The sound of the door falling shut snapped him out of his shock and he slowly walked over to the bed, dropping himself down on the messy sheet.


	8. Chapter 8

Luke had just grabbed the handle to open the door of his apartment and had already turned around to walk back into the living room, expecting Reid to be right behind.

''Can I use your shower?'' Luke turned back around to face him, suddenly puzzled by the strange tone of his voice.

It was completely lacking its usual arrogance and instead it sounded flat and defeated even almost humble if he had ever gone as far as using this word to describe Reid.

''What happened?'' Luke walked back into the hall closing the distance between them.

Reid just shook his head and pointed it towards the bathroom.

''May I?'' he asked again.

''Sure go ahead.'' Luke waved for him to walk down the hall and followed him, picking up a towel from the closet on the way.

He placed it on the sink and remained motionless in the doorframe, watching Reid strip out of his clothes and throw them over the edge of the sink.

The water turned hot immediately and Reid closed his eyes with a deep sigh as he felt it seep through his skin, warming his insides from the top down to the soles of his feet. The crystal stream ran down his strained body, rinsing off the last few hours, soothing the pain in his muscles. He had been standing in the operating room for nearly six hours and his whole body felt like one big cramp. Only his brain felt even worse. It had gone into overload long ago and he felt like he could never get it back running, let alone use it effectively. He squeezed his eyes shut tighter and brought up his left hand to rub his temples.

Just a second later he heard the sound of the shower door and from the corner of his eyes he could see the frame of Luke's naked body. He felt him move closer and he wanted to react but his brain was still not working and so he just closed his eyes again and merely registered Luke's body lining up with his own, connecting them from thighs to shoulders. He felt Luke's breath on his wet cheek and warm hands being placed on his skin.

Luke moved yet closer and when he could feel his breath against hip lips Reid instinctively parted them and looked up into Luke's eyes, dark and warm.

Luke remained glued to the spot, his eyes sinking into Reid's, willing him not to look away, willing himself not to kiss him just yet. He stared into Reid's eyes, desperate to find out what was making him tick, craving so badly to get a glimpse at this part of him he could not posses through his body.

When his own longing finally became unbearable he leaned in and connected their mouths, taking only Reid's bottom lip between his own. He first nibbled at it softly and then licked over it with the tip of his tongue. Deliberately slow he continued to breathe hints of kisses onto his lips, his tongue never entering his mouth. He gently pulled his bottom lips in softly sucking on it and then parted Reid's lips with his tongue sliding it past them slowly, pressing his mouth down on Reid's.

Reid moaned almost inaudibly and stepped closer his hands searching for the best angle to grab Luke's body.

When he felt Reid respond to the kiss, he brought one hand up to his neck to pull him closer and switch to deep french kissin. Reid suddenly felt a piercing need rise from his core, not a sexual need but a need that reached much deeper, that almost made his heart shatter. And he desperately hoped Luke would not walk just one inch away from him because all of a sudden he was sure he would have fallen apart.

_Don't let go of me_ he thought as he pushed into Luke's embrace, curling himself up against his chest, taking in Luke's heartbeat that was now running through his own blood in soft, swaying waves.

The kiss had turned deep and desperate, each of them trying to fill his own void, keeping it up for as long as they could possibly go without air. Finally Luke pulled away resting his forehead against Reid's to catch his breath. Through wet lashes he stared down at Reid's lips. They were parted and swollen red, glistening with saliva and small drops of water.

Luke licked his own lips and then lifted his head up again. He moved both his hand up to Reid's face this time going for a heavy kiss right away, his fingertips crawling around his neck searching for a grip in the wet, dirty blond strands.

Reid exhaled audibly and leaned into the touch. His head was still slightly tilted when Luke had taken his hand away and placed it to rest on his shoulder, his thumb stroking over the sensitive skin just above Reid's clavicle. Neither of them in a hurry to get anywhere they switched between slow and heavy making out, locking their eyes between kisses every so often.

Their bodies entwined, chests heaving against each other, Luke's palms were lying flat against Reid's back, roaming up and down his spine along with the water, leaving heat and sparks where they went.

The steam had wrapped around their bodies and began to cloud Luke's vision. He blinked as he felt a drop of sweat slowly running down his brow and getting caught in his lashes.

When he felt his head spin with heat and the lack of air Luke broke their kiss again. It only took him a second to regain his breath but instead of leaning in again he stayed still watching the water run across Reid's face. Slowly, his eyes followed the small trickle that had got caught around the root of his nose and then ran further down, dripping from his lips in small crystal pearls. God he was so beautiful it literally hurt to look at him. Luke struggled against the urge to turn his eyes away and focused on touching him instead. He didn't want to look away. He wanted to take in as much of this painful beauty as he possibly could.

For a short while he managed to stop moving, just keep their eyes locked but then Reid leaned in almost unnoticeably, his lips parted and Luke met him with his own, crushing their mouths together, not hesitant for a second to give him what he wanted. There was not one single of Reid's longings he would not have fulfilled the minute he'd asked him to.

While they kept kissing Luke moved his hands down Reid's body, grazing both thumbs over the slender hipbones and then to his back. How he wished he could have gone on like this forever. It broke his heart to know he'd eventually have to stop touching him, stop worshipping his body and tenderly stroking every inch of it. He had never really felt this in his life but this was a moment so precious and rare to him he would have loved to lock it up somewhere and keep it, making sure he would never forget how intimate it had really felt to be with him.

Careful to spare the spot he would have loved to touch the most, Luke softly kept running his hands over the small of Reid's back briefly resting his fingers in the ridge of his spine and then moved them over his sides, around to Reid's stomach. His palms were resting flat against it, thumbs trailing off to trace the lines of his well defined abs. With a deep wet kiss he finally dropped his hand all the way down wrapping it around Reid's erection, catching its weight in his palm. A husky moan from deep inside Reid's chest escaped into his mouth and echoed in his body.

Holding Reid's hips in place with his left hand he kept stroking, brushing and tugging slowly almost solemnly, his lips never leaving Reid's mouth. With unhurried movements he slowly worked him towards his climax and when he felt the body in his arms quiver with near orgasm he took a step forward and walked him right under the hot stream of water, backing him up against the wall. Luke moved his left hand away from Reid's hip and used it to grab his neck pulling him close to create more suction. He kissed him deeply adding more pressure to the kiss as well as to his last few strokes.

When he finally came, Reid breathlessly broke the kiss and rested his head against Luke's shoulder, hot air brushing over wet skin as he moaned Luke's name.

Luke remained motionless, silently holding him until he stepped away and out of the shower.

In the half-light of the small bathroom they each rubbed their bodies dry neither of them speaking. When he was done, Luke slung the towel around his hips and turned around to watch Reid put his clothes back on.

''You don't have to leave.'' he said. His eyes were sunk into Reid's again and they looked like liquid amber so beautiful it nearly took Reid's breath away.

'' I have to go back to the hospital.'' Reid's voice still sounded a bit husky but steady.

Luke looked at him the question raging through his mind, desperate to be asked.

Reid picked the wet towel up from the floor to toss it into the laundry bag and then looked back at Luke.

'' I lost a patient.'' he said catching Luke's gaze, holding it as he went on.

'' He died because I have taken the wrong decision.'' He added the words just simply stating, holding back whatever emotion they were carrying.

Luke moved forward yet staying out of touching range, his eyes still locked with Reid's.

''Reid you are not perfect.'' He paused and remained still, just looking at him. '' You are human.''

Luke had stated an obvious fact and under normal circumstances he would probably have felt insulted but simply the way how he had said it and said nothing else but that, almost made them feel like an absolution.


	9. Chapter 9

uke placed the stuffed grocery bags onto the counter and turned around to open the fridge.  
When he reached out for the milk he glanced down at his watch.

06.40.

He'd still have time to empty the shopping bags and maybe take a shower. Definitely no time to have dinner but then again he preferred to eat afterwards anyway.

His gaze was caught by an empty bottle of vodka standing in the door rail.

_Won't buy it won't drink it._ he had thought on his way through the supermarket and he had been convinced back then. Only, now that he looked at this empty bottle he was not so sure anymore. Would it not have been a better idea to buy one after all? So it was here, what harm was there if he did not drink it after all. Like that he would at least have the opportunity to have a drink if he felt like one.

His day at the diner had been the same back breaking, unfulfilling routine as always and he did not like the job one bit more than the day he had started it.  
With a glance to the wall calendar he reassured himself that there was still enough time to take care of his university applications. He knew well that is was his only option if he really wanted to get where he wanted to be but he was also well aware that due to his expulsion from school a few years ago it most likely meant he'd have to leave Oakdale. Not an idea he was going for at all.

Then again compared to his writers block this was not even remotely a problem.

With an annoyed sigh Luke went through the bags, grabbing soap, toothpaste and other bathroom items.

He opened the shelf above the sink and randomly placed everything inside. When he closed the door his gaze dropped down to the small note still attached to the right corner of the mirror.

Luke ran his thumb over it to straighten the tiny dog-ear and turned back around for the kitchen.

When he was done with the shopping items he quickly rushed through a shower and was barely dressed as the doorbell rang at exactly 07.00 P.M.

When he went to answer it he saw Reid standing in the door frame, wearing a dark suit and a tie, looking at him purposefully.

Luke stepped aside to let him enter, giving him a confused look.

Reid barely took one step forward and pointed down at his watch.

'' You have ten minutes to get ready. The dress code is suit and tie.''

''What the hell are you talking about.'' Luke was still standing in the hall, frowning at the unexpected picture before his eyes.

''You have been promoted Snyder. Forget about the sex tonight. You are going to accompany me to a business dinner.''

'' You want me to be your date?''

''Not really, no. I want you to come with me and tell the suits what a great medical facility Oakdale Memorial is and how progressive we are blah, blah, blah.''

''And you think I will do that because?''

''Because you're good at it. You can do the … people thing. '' Reid looked at him before he went on. ,,And because there is no way I can lie so shamelessly about Oakdale.''

''You are asking me for a favor?'' Luke had caught the drift and a smile began to appear on his lips.

''You owe me the night anyway.''

''I owe you sex. But no PR services.''

''Really? You're going to make me beg?''

''Not for this.'' Luke curved his lips into a broader smile.

''Just shut up and get your but in gear.''

''But only because I know you'd be lost without my help.'' Secretly grinning to himself Luke rushed for his bedroom and shouted back for Reid to wait in the kitchen.

The restaurant was unusually crowded for a Tuesday evening, a nervous crowd of mid fifties pushing and shoving through the lobby.

On their way through the lounge Reid's eyes got caught by a huge purple banner saying in glittering letters:

_Welcome class of 1974_

The waiter led their way through the after work crowd hanging out at thee bar and pointed them towards a table tugged into a corner next to the window.

_Thank god_ Reid thought as he squeezed into the corner seat on the head of the table. At least he would not have to sit in the middle of this chatter front.

Luke was sitting right next to him, a radiant smile lighting up his face as he eased his way through the small talk. It fascinated Reid in a strange way to watch him to this social network tango he despised with all his heart.

Normally it would have annoyed Reid beyond possible to have to rely on somebody's support but this didn't make him feel the usual reluctance, it just felt right.

The dinner was long and boring as usual and by the time he had hoped he could go home eventually Bob had suggested to take the party to the bar and of course the suits had immediately rooted for that idea.

He was not sure for how long he had been sitting in this small talk inferno but it sure felt like half of his life. Nobody was even taking any notice of him and he seriously began to ask himself why he was even sticking around. The bar was easily crowded enough to just disappear and so he just slid down from his barstool grabbing a bottle of champagne on his way.

The bottle still in his hand he walked out to the hall where Luke had disappeared a minute ago. Just a second later he saw the doors of the restrooms open and Luke head towards him.

''Come on.'' He grabbed his arm before he could even talk, pulling him into the direction of the staircase.

''It's painfully boring in there. I suggest we have our own private party '' With those words he dropped himself onto the floor of the dark empty first floor corridor handing over the champagne bottle to Luke.

Through the permanently opening door that led to the main ball room Luke could hear the throbbing beats of the music and the cheerful chattering .

''Are you sure nobody will miss us if we don't go back in there?''

Luke sat down on the wine red carpet placing the champagne bottle beside him with a soft thud.

''I surely don't miss them!''

Reid let his head fall back against the wall and dragged a hand over his face. ''I hate this part of the job.''

'' I hate every part of my job.'' Luke took a sip out of the bottle and handed it  
over to Reid.

''Why do you do it?''

''Because it is the only thing I found.'' Luke replied, his tone a little pouty.

''I was under the impression you wanted to study.''

Luke looked down at his shoes, catching the reflection of the emergency light on the shiny material with his eyes.

''I'm not sure that is going to work out.''

''Why? You enroll you study. What could be the hold up? '' Reid seemed genuinely surprised by his doubts.

''Let's just not talk about this tonight ok? ''

''Ok.'' Reid took another sip out of the champagne bottle and placed it down on the carpet between their feet.

''I can't believe how cheap this champagne is. Even for Oakhell I would still have expected a little more.''

''Why do you keep ranting about Oakdale? What is so bad about it?'' Luke turned around so he was facing Reid.

''You mean apart from the fact that you hold me hostage here?''

In the scarcely lit corridor Luke could see his features turn into a sarcastic frown.

''No seriously, Reid. What is so bad about small towns?''

''Believe me you don't want to get me started on this one.''

''Maybe I do.''

'' What is good about them? How can you like to live in a community of self satisfied people that live to judge? And let's not forget about the bunch of poor souls that sees their biggest fulfillment in pleasing others, getting multiple orgasms over the fact that they fit in? Seriously, how can it be a person's aim in life to live up to what a stranger believes they should be?''

''It does have its good sides. ''

''Save your breath Snyder. ''

''What about friendship and loyalty? ''

''As long as you live up to their expectations. ''

''Why are you bitter? ''

''I told you before I am not bitter. I'm just too intelligent to buy this act.''

''Well modesty is really not one of your big qualities.'' Reid just shrugged the reply off and reached out for the bottle of champagne.

'' And don't tell me you had a great time coming out in this one horse town.''

Luke turned his head away looking down at his shoes again.

''To close to home?'' Reid guessed.

''That was long ago.'' Luke shook his head.

'' I am pretty sure this town is not full of open gays either. I bet you twenty bugs Noah was in the closet when you met him.''

''What makes you think that?''

''Well I am not sure he's not in the closet today.''

''Shut up!'' Luke gave Reid a half heartedly reproachful look as he turned around.

''What is wrong about finding someone you love and fight to be with them? Do you really think it is better to walk into some gay bar in Dallas and pick someone up just because you are positive he has the right sexual orientation and then have him steal your TV the morning after?'' Luke was now being purposefully sarcastic.

''No one has ever stolen my TV.'' Reid crooked a smile and Luke couldn't help but join into his soft laughter.

''I still like living here. I …''

''Never mind.'' Luke interrupted himself after a few seconds of silence.

''What?''

Luke shook his head before he went on. ''I was just going to say I have so many memories attached to everything here but I guess sometimes it can be good to leave certain things behind.''

Downstairs Luke could hear the door open again and in the twilight of the hall he saw Reid's features change just very slightly, almost imperceptible.

''So why did you become a doctor?'' Luke went for the first question that came into his mind.

''Because I knew I could do it. I knew I was good enough to help people that if it wasn't for me would be lost.'' Reid took another sip of the chaep champagne and handed it over over to  
Luke, holding his gaze as he did.

''Your turn. '' he said, intently keeping their eyes locked. ,,What was the biggest mistake you have ever made?''

''I made out with my step grandfather.''

''Come again.''

''I made out with him to get back at Noah for… never really letting me know he wanted me, or – I don't know. It was …I wasn't really thinking back then. I would definitely never do that again!''

''You made out with your grandmothers husband?''

''I know!He was into me and for some reason I thought it was a got idea to take advantage of that. I was not thinking clearly.''

''Your step grandfather had the hots for you.'' Reid chuckled as he processed the information.

''Talking about nothing ever happens in this town. Who can blame the guy though, after all you're fucking hot.''

''That is not funny.'' Luke turned his head , flashing Reid an angry glance.

''No seriously, what are you some kind of closet case magnet?''

,,What the hell is the matter with you? ''

,,Nothing. I am just stating the obvious. You_ are_ hot. Obscenely hot. And you probably have no idea.'' Luke looked at him half outraged and half puzzled by his words. He wanted to reply something but was not quite sure what so he just remained silent.

Reid was now staring at him, checking him out openly.''Why do think I wanted to have you from the first time I laid eyes on you?''  
Luke wanted to look away but his gaze was captured by Reid's and he suddenly found it impossible to drag himself away from the way Reid was looking at him.

,,I bet you have no clue about the effect you have on people? I barely have to look at you and I feel the urge to pin you against this wall and do to you whatever comes into my mind.''

Luke kept looking at him, watching his pupils blow as he dropped his gaze to Luke's lips and licked his own.  
HIs gaze dropped and Luke watched him reached out his hand, placing his index finger on Luke's parted lips, his fingertip almost touching his tongue.

He gently ran it along the sensitive skin the rest of his hand cupping Luke's jawline.

,, Especially your lips.'' He said in a husky voice his eyes never leaving Luke's face.  
''There is no way to think anything else but blowjob when you look at them. There is no way to shake off the picture of you getting on your knees and those lips being wrapped around my cock.''

Luke swallowed and watched Reid's lips move as he spoke. His throat suddenly felt dry and he felt his heart rate rise fiercely at this simple touch.

Reid's thumb slid inside his mouth and he softly closed his lips around it, covering it in heat and moist.

''I want you so badly.'' He heard the words whispered against his earlobes and the next thing he felt was Reid's moist lips on his neck, sucking on his skin as if it belonged to him.

He exhaled with a deep sigh and dropped both his hand s own on the carpet as he leaned back against the wall.

Reid turned his head so he could kiss his on the lips and then pulled away looking at him.

''Don't go away. I'll be right back.''

By the time Luke had got on his feet he was already back, standing in front of him a silver key card in his hands.

Without any further hesitation Reid grabbed a fistful of his shirt and went for a deep soulful kiss, walking him back towards the staircase. They stumbled up the stairs only breaking apart for orientation and when they had reached the right floor Reid pushed him down the hall and backed him up against the door of their room.

Never breaking the kiss he frantically fumbled to slide the card into the lock and pushed Luke forward as it opened. They stumbled into the dark room and Reid kicked the door shut with his foot, tugging at Luke's tie nearly strangling him as he undid it. Luke's hands were all over his body already and he reached out his own to hurriedly undo their belts. With frantic movements both of them struggled to get out of their clothes unwilling to give up the close body contact.

When Luke was finally naked Reid pushed him down on the bed his own body crashing down on him, covering him from toes to shoulders. Reid grabbed Luke's wrists and pinned his hands above him, licking and sucking at his neck.

"I need to have you fast," he groaned huskily, biting down hard on Luke's earlobe.

He heard him sigh deeply and felt his body writhe under him his bare erection grinding against his own still clothed crotch.

Reid moved his head so he was facing Luke and stared right down into his eyes, savoring the unhidden lust that sparkled inside the warm brown.

''I'm your's.'' Luke replied breathless, hot air brushing against Reid's saliva coated lips.

Luke urged his hands between their hips and fumbled eagerly to undo Reid's lifted up his hips helping Luke to take them off and sunk down on him, bare flesh now rubbing against his own swollen cock, skin rubbing against sensitive skin, driving him insane with want.

Reid dove in for another deep kiss and then his hand slipped down between Luke's thighs. With a firm grip he reached out for his erection and stroked slowly, relishing in the sight of Luke giving his body to him once more.

As Reid's thumb trailed off to his opening and gently pushed down on the ring of muscles, Luke had to bite down hard on his lips to retain a minimum of focus.

His hands resting flat against Reid's shoulders blades, he shifted his feet to bend his knees and lifted his hip. Reid slid one finger and then two in gently moving them to relax Luke's muscles fueling his need with his painfully slow motions.

When he felt Luke was stretched he leaned over for his pants to grab the condom from the pocket. He spit into his hand a few times and shifted to a position that would give him the perfect angle of entrance. He moved gently as he entered his body considering the fact that his saliva was only scantily working as a lubricant.

Watching Luke's features change with every inch he went deeper as slow as he possibly coul, he wanted this sweet torture to last and he urges himself to slow yet down. Through his clouded senses he heard Luke's hitched breathing and when he looked down at him, lips parted, face flushed and eyes squeezed shut he felt want rise so savagely inside him it nearly tore him apart.

Luke's legs were wrapped around his hips, trying to urge him on and he felt his own need to thrust strongly into the quivering body beneath him grow out of his control and then he just helplessly gave in to his urges, claiming his body hard with every thrust.

Luke grabbed a fistful of the freshly washed sheets trying to steady himself for more leverage to thrust back against Reid hips.  
Just a few moments later he shifted and reached up for Reid's shoulders his fingers digging into the hot flesh. Reid groaned at the sudden flash of pain and squeezed his eyes shut.

Panting heavily he steadied himself on one arm and then reached out for Luke's erection, stroking him to the rhythm of his thrusts. When he felt Luke was on the edge he pulled out almost all the way and met his last stroke with a deep forceful thrust. Luke came with a moan deep from his chest, his nails digging even deeper into Reid's skin.

Reid licked the hot liquid away from his thumb and wiped the rest of it against the sheets. Thrusting a few more times he rocked himself towards his own climax and then collapsed on top of Luke still buried inside the slick heat, his heart breaking at the thought he'd have to move away so soon.

They remained motionless for a while, both breathing hot air against the others skin until Reid rolled off Luke tossing the condom into the rubbish bin as he did.

Luke rolled onto his right side closing the distance between their bodies and Reid shifted closer wrapping his arms around him to stroke the small of his back. His mind already cloaked with sleep Luke pulled up his left leg against his body. His knee was now resting against the wet spot of his own semen on the sheets but he did not even really notice it. He didn't struggle against his eyes falling shut and instead just snuggled up closer to the warm body lying next to him.


	10. Chapter 10

The first thing that came through to his brain was the ticking of the watch on the nightstand and when he realized he was waking up, he lifted his head to orientate himself. The room was dark and he could barely recognize the frames of the typical hotel furniture.

The heavy curtain was swaying lazily with a light breeze of air and there was almost no sound coming from the street a few levels below.

Obviously it was right in the middle of the night.

When he reluctantly moved to shift into a more comfortable sleeping position he noticed that Reid was sitting in the arm chair across the room. He was just sitting straight in the chair, wearing nothing but his boxers, his thumb pressed into his temple and his index finger resting right above the root of his nose.

''Why are you up?''

Luke propped himself up on his elbows, eyes still half closed.

''I'll give you three guesses and the first two don't count.'' Reid lifted his head to look at him.

Luke made a mumbling sound as shook his head to get the remaining sleep out of his brain.

''What's the matter?'' He had sat up straight on the mattress and was now looking directly at Reid.

For a short while there was nothing but silence and his unanswered question hanging in the air.

Finally Luke grabbed the sheets around his body and got up to sit down on the chair beside Reid.

''You don't look good.'' He said, leaning slightly towards him. ''What's wrong?''

Since Reid still didn't speak Luke decided to lead the conversation.

''The surgery earlier this week?'' he guessed.

Reid hadn't planned to even consider the question but then it happened somehow automatically. He briefly turned his head to look at Luke and then opened his mouth to speak.

Luke remained motionless, his eyes only moving slightly to scan the nigh imperceptible change in Reid's features.

,,Right after I had undergone surgery to donate my kidney, I caught an infection. It lasted throughout my third year at medical school.'' He looked up into Luke's eyes and then down at his hands again before he went on.

,, My advisor wanted me to take the year off, hell he even came up with the stupid idea that I should put off my studies until further notice. But I wouldn't hear any of that. I just couldn't see why any circumstances should have influenced my decision.'' He stopped talking again, looking up at Luke for a second.

,,There were a few times when I was almost sure I was wrong, sometimes I felt so beat and weak I had no idea how to actually deal but I just never allowed myself to give up. I knew I could do it f I just kept going. It had to work if I just put enough effort into it. I graduated according to schedule; top of my class.''

The words were a simple statement, not tainted with arrogance or even pride, almost as though he had expected nothing else.

''Losing a patient still is the only thing I can't handle in this job because it reminds me that sometimes my willpower is not enough.''

Luke leaned yet forward in his chair, still focused on Reid, staying silent so he could go on if he wanted to.

,,I don't fail. Not if I can help it.''

,,You can't always.'' Luke spoke the words almost tentatively, instinctively still not sure what they would mean.

''I know.'' Reid dragged a hand over his face and pulled his shoulders back to sit straight again.

While he still watched him carefully Luke's gaze slowly began to roam away from Reid's face, over his shoulders and then was stopped by the few inches of dark, scarred skin right above the hem of his boxers and he feels his heart sink at the sight.

Suddenly he was captured by the overwhelming urge to lay them both down on the bed, just to hold him, wrap him in his love, wrap his arms around his body shielding him from everything that could cause him pain.

It almost hurt physically as he had to retain himself from giving in to those urges but there was nothing sexual about it and so it didn't have its rightful place here. Repeating that silently in his head like a mantra, Luke shifted forward until he was sitting on the edge of his chair and instead looked Reid in the eyes again.

'' You are a brilliant doctor Reid. That doesn't change because you are human. ''

With a sudden sigh Reid pushed himself up from the chair and bent down to the floor to pick up his pants.

With a quick move he straightened them and lifted up his right leg to step inside.

''What are you doing?'' After an initial second of bewilderment Luke's brain had caught up with the situation and he stared at him, questioning.

,,I'm getting dressed. Even if it's just a small town I will still not walk home naked.'' he reached down again to pick up his shirt from the floor and slipped inside.

,,It's 02.30 a.m.''

,,I hate hotel rooms. I'll never get any sleep here and I have a surgery at eight.'' Reid picked up his watch from the nightstand and wrapped it around his wrist as he spoke.

As he watched him get dressed all the way, Luke suddenly felt an awkward chill rise in his heart, creeping up into his throat to almost cut off his air.

''I paid for the room when I checked in last night.'' Reid gave him the information, casually looking at him before he headed for the door.

,, I see you on Tuesday.'' he said before the door snapped shut.

Still almost in shock with the sudden change of mood Luke automatically got up from the chair and walked back to bed. He slowly sat down on the edge and let his body drop the rest of the distance, pulling the sheets with him to crawl under them.

Of course Reid was going to leave for his own home, barely a few streets away, if he hated to sleep in hotels. This was nothing but normal so why the hell could he not stop feeling like he had just lost something then.

The first thing Luke noticed when he got up was the freezing chill still lingering around his heart. It came through to his mind even before it was cleared from last night's dreams entirely. He wanted to take a deep breath but his chest would only rise so far and so he just cuddled up against the covers again keeping his breathing shallow and heavy.

He squeezed his eyes shut again and tried to fall back asleep, positive that when he woke up again everything would feel different, would just feel normal again. But nothing like that happened. Instead he just heard the intrusive sound of his cell phone alarm clock just inches away from his ear.

''You are not falling for him.'' He mumbled into the pillow, where his face was entirely buried, his voice insecure and almost a little desperate.

''You are not falling for him.'' He repeated this time a little steadier.

Only moving his left arm he fumbled for his cell, switched off the alarm and then immediately jumped up on his feet. He had always thought of getting up in the morning like ripping off a band aid. Either you do it with one quick move or you will have to struggle endlessly.

''You're not falling for him.'' He repeated the words a few times on his way to the bathroom and quickly rushed through his shower.

When he reached out for the huge, white towel just three minutes later, his mind was already working.

He wrapped the towel around his hips and walked towards the bathroom mirror. He grabbed the single use from a small basket on the right side of the sink and looked straight at his reflection.

''You are not falling for him.'' He said again, this time in a tone that almost convinced him.


	11. Chapter 11

Luke threw his keys on the table and leaned over to grab his cell.

No missed calls.

Very good

On his way over to the fridge he went through the pile of mail he was still holding. There was nothing but leaflets and advertising brochures except for the last one, a final notice.

''Ah fuck.'' With a guilty sigh he looked over to the pile on the dresser. There it was, unopened and at least a month old, along with a few other official letters he had just ignored.

''Damn.'' He slammed the rest of the mail down on the table and placed the final notice into the urgent pile.

While he waited for his computer to boot up he pulled off the foil from his yoghurt and scraped it clean with his spoon. Now a quick check through his mails, then another bite to eat and then he'd still have half an hour to kill before Reid would show up. Maybe his writer's block had lifted a little today, he would have to keep trying at least.

Luke put down his yoghurt and reached out for the touchpad.

Seven unread.

Two spam, one from his mother, one from Noah and the rest replies to applications he had sent out.

He clicked on the one from the investment bank. At least this was just formalities, he was pretty sure he knew what he was about to read.

And there it was, right on clue.

Dear candidate

We would like to thank you for expressing an interest in our company by sending us your application.

We are sorry to inform you that we cannot provide an internship which fits to your interest.

We hope you will soon find an internship to suit your requirements and talents.

Hell yes it does. Luke thought to himself as he rolled his eyes. It pays money and I don't have to wear skates.

This particular way of phrasing a rejection had never seemed even remotely appropriate to him but today it truly pissed him off.

Next mail, from another bank - same thing.

And another one.

]Awesome.

Luke deleted them and clicked on the message from his mother.

Luke honey,

I am really worried about you. I still don't know what really happened between you and your father

Why don't you at least talk to me? I don't even know what you are up to right no Call me!

His mother trying to talk him out of his decisions, was one thing he did not want to deal with now. He quickly clicked it away pretending he had not read it.

Now Noah.

Hey Luke

I met your mum today and she told me that you have broken bonds with your father and don't even want to have anything to do with her money either. Why the hell are you still paying for my hospital bills? What is going on? Call me when you get this I need to talk to you.

Noah

Luke sighed and dragged a hand over his face. This was even better. What the hell was he going to tell him? He placed both elbows on the table resting his face in his palms for a moment.

God, he could do with a drink.

He looked down at his watch. Reid was supposed to show up in twenty minutes.

Luke switched off his computer and walked over to the fridge. There was one untouched bottle of Vodka standing in the door rail. He had bought it last Friday for possible emergencies.

Actually this was one.

He bent down to reach for the bottle and straightened up again. No he would never be able to cover that up. With a sigh he swung the door closed again just to tear it open right after.

Screw that, he reassured himself. He could just have a coffee or a mint drop and well, actually it was none of his business anyway.

When Luke answered the door twenty minutes later he had downed two vodka straight and was now sucking on his third mint drop. Perfectly timed he thought, as he swallowed the last one on his way to the door.

Even better. Reid was appeareantly still talking on his cell and walked straight past him into the kitchen. This would buy him another five minutes.

He went behind the kitchen counter secretly reaching for the box of mints. After all he should not push it. Minty breath could come from freshly washed teeth but purposefully reaching for mint drop before greeting someone could always rise suspicion.

Luke moved the drops around in his mouth with his tongue as he turned around to clear out the dishwasher.

Unfortunately this was not so perfectly timed. Very unnacording to the timetable Luke had had in mind Reid had already ended his phone conversation and was standing right next to him before he could even react.

''Come on let's hit the sheets Snyder.'' He placed his cell onto the counter and stepped closer to Luke.

''Oh come on.'' He pulled away again, rolling his eyes.

''What?'' Luke stored the drops under his tongue foolishly hoping this was not about them.

''Mint drops? Don't tell me you really believe that works.''

''Works for what? '' Luke could not come up with a better idea and he knew damn well where this was going to head.

Reid remained standing right in front of him staring into his eyes as he replied.

''How many alcoholics do you think I have seen in my career? Let alone the two I lived with for half my life. How many do you think used that trick? Take a wild guess.''

''So what?'' Luke had now decided to go for the defensive way. ''Even if that should be true it is still none of your business and besides you had no problem with the champagne last Thursday so just shut up and stay out of this once and for all?''

''Please, there[i] is[/i] a difference between a glass of champagne on a night out and being dead drunk at 07.00 p.m. right in the middle of the week. ''

''What the hell is your problem? So I was having a mint drop. So what? Accusing me of alcoholism just based on that is quite a leap even for someone as arrogant as you don't you think?''

''Really?'' With one quick step Reid had darted over to the kitchen counter, sniffing at the empty, used glass he had picked up.

''Vodka straight.'' He stated holding the glass into Luke's direction.

Luke rushed forward to follow him behind the counter. He stuck out his index finger, pointing it at him as he spoke.

''Now listen we are going to do this one way [u]or[/u] the other and if you treat me like a fucking whore than you stay out of everything not related to sticking your dick into my ass.''

''Woah, watch your French.'' Reid put the glass down again and frowned back at Luke a little taken aback by this sudden violent outburst.

'' What the hell pissed you off like that?''

''Well what do you think? I paid for the room? Why don't you just throw a few twenties on the nightstand next time? Oh and by the way the grief care is extra.''

''Hold on. If you are not happy with the way things are going you have no one but yourself to blame.''

Luke shook his head, his face now a furious grimace.

''How is this _my_ fault?'' he asked shouting.

''One day you are all over my ass because I don't like to spill my guts over everyone I meet accusing me of feeling superior to everyone else, then you suddenly give me heat for talking to people. Whatever it is that you are taking out on me here, deal with it!''

''Deal with it?'' Luke furrowed his brow and pulled his head back slightly.

''You are acting like a complete ass and I am supposed to - deal with it? What the hell is wrong with you Reid? Do you really have no idea what a normal human being behave like or does it get you off to treat people like that? Have you ever considered the fact that there might be a few issues you have to deal with. Apparently you can't even handle your own bit so don't go dishing out advice.''

''If you are looking for trouble then keep running your mouth like that Snyder. Otherwise I warn you to watch your words.''

' 'Why? Because you are in a position of power here, or at least you think you are. Because you call the shots? You constantly seem to forget about one tiny uncomfortable detail . You blackmailed me so I would sleep with you. [i]You[/i] want [i]me[/i] and if I decide to hell with the bills and blow this deal off, then I have lost nothing. ''

Luke's voice became steadier again and he held on to the word he spoke, as if they were his connection to the safe world. The world outside this gloomy spiral of emotions he had gotten himself into.

''You are the one that wants me.'' Luke said again and when he was sure he could keep his emotions out of his voice he went on. ''I don't want you.''

While he listened to his words Reid never turned his gaze away and Luke could see that he was struggling with something.

He dropped his gaze to Reid's lips for just a second and when he looked up again the shadow in his eyes had dissappeared and there was nothing but rainy blue and calm in them.

Luke heard him breathe evenly and when his gaze dropped to his lips again he saw him part them with a soft sound.

He looked up again, feverishly searching Reid's eyes for any sign of what was going on behind them.

Compared to the yelling before the silence was almost plastic and it made Luke nervous.

''You are one lousy liar.'' Reid finally said and he stepped closer, a breeze of his scent washing over Luke's senses. As he inhaled he could smell hospital disinfectant and air dried clothes.

His eyelids had almost fell shut at the sensation but he forced them open again.

Reid parted his lips a little more and took a step forward closing the distance between their bodies.

Luke swallowed as he forced himself to not look away, silently cursing himself for how easily he responded to Reid's presence.

''So you don't want me?'' Reid asked, rolling the words off his tongue deliberately slow.

The thoughts were rushing through Luke's brain but he could not find anything to reply so he just held Reid's gaze hoping that it was enough to prove his point.

''Then tell me to stop.'' Reid took another step forward until he had him backed up against the wall, his body pressing into Luke's and then reached out for his shirt, slowly beginning to unbutton it.

Luke drew in a sharp breath and swallowed again. His eyelid were so heavy now that he could barely keep them open and as Reid leaned in breathing against his ear, sucking on the soft skin right beneath they fell shut.

''If you don't want me, then do it. Tell me stop.''

He pulled away, to shift them face to face, his eyes dark under his lashes, his wet lips almost touching Luke's.

Luke tried to turn his gaze away but instead it dropped down to Reid's hands following them as they moved over his body.

He reached them out to undo Luke's belt, grazing his thumb over bare skin just above.

While he was still working on Luke's belt he leaned in for a slow kiss, drawing a desperate sigh from Luke's soul. Luke's head instinctively moved forward and he kissed him back, grabbing the fabric of his shirt with both fists, his struggle lost before he had even been able to put it up.

They kissed feverishly for a while neither of them caring to undress the other one further. Reid's hand went around Luke's neck and he kept it there as he pulled away two seconds later.

''Open your eyes.'' Reid said in a calm and deep voice.

He waited for Luke to oblige and then gave him a second to adapt.

''No listen carefully Luke. If I catch you drunk just once more, I will be on the first plane out of Oakdale, leaving Noah to the care of the local neurologists and I think you are aware what that means for his case.''

Their bodies still pressed together and their faces just inches apart Luke was caught between schok and arousal.

''You can't do that.'' Said in a breathy voice.

Reid nodded his head.

,, I can resign from a patients treatment and have a co worker step in for me as soon as I don't see myself fit for handling the case anymore. And believe me the minute I catch you drunk again I will.''

''You are not going to do that.'' Luke tried to convince himself.

''I wouldn't take the chance if I were you.'' Reid spoke calmly, his voice not threatening just simply stating.

''Are we clear about that?'' he asked, his eyes still locked with Luke's.

Luke nodded.

''Good.'' Reid leaned in to connect their lips again and began moving, walking them both towards the bedroom.

When they'd reached the bedroom they had already lost their shirt on the way and Reid briefly let go of Luke's shoulders to undo their pants so they could easily step out of them before lying down on the bed.

Once he was fully undressed Reid lay down on top of Luke, shifting their bodies until their chests where touching and their lips just inches away.

He did not kiss him right away instead stayed still for a second, staring down into his eyes.

And it didn't fail to make Luke's heart skip the usual beat. He loved the way it made him feel when he looked at him like that. He could look at him like he mattered, like nothing but him mattered even if it was just for sex.

Reid slowly ran one hand down Luke's side, only fingertips and heel touching his skin. He rested his palm flat against his hipbone and then reached inside his boxers, stroking him with one hand while he shifted his weight onto his left elbow. Luke instinctively arched his back, moving his head trying to bring his lips closer to Reid's and Reid met him halfway only to change direction shortly before their lips met.

With a frustrated sigh Luke let his head fall back onto the pillow. Reid's mouth was now on his neck, lips and tongue leaving a wet trail as he sucked on it. Luke closed his eyes and then he felt Reid shift off his body and with a firm to shoulders he was flipped on his side Reid's chest covering his back. With a quick motion Reid pushed his boxers down his hips and Luke struggled to kick them away with his feet.

Both arms wrapped around his chest Reid pulled him closer, bringing them into the right position. He briefly slid his thumb across Luke's bottom lip then reached down, his hands first on Luke's hipbone then his ass and his thighs to push his right legs up so he could get better access. Luke tried to find the right rhythm between grinding his hips against the mattress and pushing back into Reid's touch, trying to guide his thumb that was traced along the curve of his ass.

Luke made a whimpering sound when he suddenly felt Reid pull away but then he heard the sound of the opening drawer and the bottle of lube being opened and the feeling of loss was replaced by sweet excitement.

Reid slid one well coated finger insdie Luke's body listening to his deep but still even breathing. He moved slowly, preparing him , but then he deliberately lingered on the one spot he knew was always doing magic and he drew in a sharp breath as he heard Luke's breathing hitch.

Luke moaned deeply again, shifting his bent leg even higher up on the bed opening himself up to Reid.

Reid would have loved to take his time and tease him a little but the sight of his body displayed naked in front of him, ready to be taken by him made his stomach twitch and so he began to move faster, now almost rushing the preparations.

At first he still moved slowly, barely even thrusting and Luke had to rock his hips back against him to create the friction he was so desperate to feel. He reached one hand behind himself digging his nails into Reid's hips trying to make him move faster but Reid grabbed his hand and placed it onto the pillow next to Luke's head, entwining their fingers.

As Reid finally began to pick up some pace and moved inside him harder and faster with every thrust, Luke's brain stopped working and he lost himself in the feeling of Reid all over and all inside his body.

Getting hold of his last bit of willpower Luke guided their entwined hand down between his legs placing his own hand over Reid's as he wrapped it around his cock.

Reid came just shortly after him and Luke felt his insides fill up with satisfaction and fear at the same time. The fear of losing Reid' s heat inside him and around him. The fear of having to part from this body that kept him so warm.

He brought Reid's hand up to his mouth and kissed it before he pulled it close to his chest. Still breathing heavily he turned his head around and buried his face inside the pillow, sealing his lips.

When Reid got up from the bed, Luke was already half asleep but he still struggled to open his eyes so he could watch him get dressed.


	12. Chapter 12

Reid slowly lifted his head up from the pillow when he realized there was no way to make himself believe he was still asleep. By the moonlight filtering through the half closed shades and the silence on the street he could tell it was nowhere near morning. He struggled to reach out his arm heavy with the lack of a few nights sleep and grabbed the alarm clock.

04.25.

With a labored sigh he pushed the covers aside and sat up straight on the edge of the mattress. There was absolutely no use in hoping he could fall back asleep. It had not worked yesterday or the day before for that matter.

Careful not to wake Katie or the kid, he tiptoed into the dark kitchen and fumbled for the light switch. While he waited for the coffee to get ready he walked over to the dresser and picked up his wallet. The leather felt cool against his fingers as he flipped through the credit card folds. Using his thumb he slid the picture out from behind his driving license. He dropped the wallet onto the kitchen counter and sat down on the couch. Just listening to his own breathing he stared down at it.

With a cup of coffee in his hand he walked over to the phone dialing the number he could have recited in his sleep.

''This is Dr. Reid Oliver. I want to speak to Dr. Young.''

Reid rolled his eyes at the expected answer from the other end of the line

''Why don't you let him take that decision.'' he calmly stated.

While he held the line he walked over to the kitchen to get a refill.

''It's about that case that I had to take here in Oakdale.''

'' I will transfer the patient to Dallas after all. ''

''No I am doing this case pro… the bills are taken care of.''

''Yes I did ask for a six months leave to take this case but I can't work here the hospital is completely antiquate and the local staff is a disaster.''

''Of course I will.''

''Four weeks.''

''Alright I'll be in touch.''

With a sigh he threw the phone into the direction of the coffee table and dropped himself onto the couch again.

* * *

When Luke walked towards the door the thoughts were well organized and prepared in his head and he was almost feeling a little sad to know that this was going to become reality now so he tried to recall the feeling of relief and satisfaction when he had taken the decision earlier that day.

His heart skipped a beat as the door was opened and Reid standing right in front of him, within touching range. Within a second the whole theory part broke down and the real deal turned out to be something he could not have prepared for anyway. Focus he reassured himself as he swallowed nervously, searching for the right way to make this clear yet fast.

Reid's eyes were already on his lips as he stepped inside and Luke tried to find a way to not look at him without seeming too suspicious but the gaze was magnetic and he couldn't help but look at him. Closing the door behind them, he took a deep breath and reassured himself again.

Just stay calm, just say it.

But then everything happened before he could catch up with it. The next breath he took smelled of aftershave, hospital disinfectant and Reid and before he even felt his hand on his face he had already closed his eyes and leaned in to the touch. Without thinking he parted his lips and returned the deep kiss that Reid was claiming from him.

What harm was there if he slept with him once more? He could just tell him afterwards. Reid would probably not have accepted his backing out without notice anyway.

The kiss was purposeful and demanding and it reminded Luke a little of the very first kiss they had shared. At the thought of this being the last one he suddenly couldn't control a desperate whimper rising in his chest and he pulled Reid deeper into the kiss to muffle the sound.

Reid reached out for Luke's shirt and undid the buttons quickly, his fingertips never leaving Luke's skin as his hands moved down. When he felt the soft fabric slide off his shoulders and a breeze of air graze his bare shoulders he pushed deeper into Reid's mouth trying to compensate the sudden feeling out cold.

Just like mostly before it was Reid taking the lead and he walked them to the bedroom, never letting go off Luke's body on the way. While he undressed them both with frantic movements his lips trailed off to Luke's neck making the skin glisten with their saliva.

Luke let his head fall side wards to give him better access. He took a step back towards the bed but instead of pushing him down onto it Reid moved his mouth away from his neck and looked up into his eyes. For a few seconds he kept their eyes locked and then slowly sunk down on his knees.

The first thing that hit his brain was the loss of intimacy and the disappointment it caused to rise inside him. He wanted to protest in some way, claim it back but then - God that looked so hot.

Reid naked, kneeling in front of him and it disturbed him that he reacted to this so easily. It was not what he wanted. He wanted him close, wanted – no maybe he wanted just this. Luke squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to follow his own thoughts. When he opened them just a second later Reid lifted his head and stared up at him, licking his lips.

What are you doing? Luke helplessly asked himself. He closed his eyes again and then he felt Reid's warm hands on his hips and then his lips wrapping around him. Moist heat so delicious and intoxicating it nearly made his breathing stop.

Suddenly so shaky on his feet, he grabbed the first thing he could reach. His fingers entwined in the soft blonde curls, Luke began to lose track of his worries and doubts. He felt his body react to Reid like it had never known anything else. Reid tightened his grip on his hips and Luke exhaled sharply at the slight pain it caused. Luke buried his fingers deeper in Reid's hair tugging , desperate to stay on his feet as he felt his climax built fast, way too fast. Torn between his craving for release and the wish for this to last as long as it just possible could, he let out a frustrated whimper.

When he finally came he was almost disappointed he would have to let go but then it felt so breathtakingly good when Reid let him come in his mouth that everything else just did not matter anymore.

Reid slowly rose up on his feet again making sure that Luke's eyes were locked with his as he swallowed. Luke was still trying to catch his breath when he felt he was being pushed down on the bed and flipped over on his side.

He felt cool air on his back and then it was covered with Reid's chest, his heart racing against Luke's shoulder blades. Reid wrapped his left arm around his shoulders to keep him steady. Through the daze of his satisfaction Luke heard a condom wrapper being torn and then he felt Reid shift as he covered his erection with one hand. Luke wanted to move his leg up so Reid could have the access he needed but his limbs felt heavy and numb and he could focus on nothing but his own breathing.

Soon he felt Reid's hand on his thigh, moving it in place and then his fingers preparing him. When Reid broke past the ring of his muscles his body was still quivering and then quivering again.

Lost in the feeling of hot breath against his neck and Reid's nails digging into his skin, Luke just helplessly pushed back against the warm body behind him.

Reid thrust into him strongly, his hips moving fast and frenzied and Luke's head began to spin as the sated feeling of afterglow mingled with strange rebuilding lust.

He had never had anyone move so long inside him after he came and it was so intense he was not sure that this was even real.

The next few minutes that followed were a mixture of heat, ecstasy, satisfaction and complete abandon and when he felt wet lips touch his neck, breathing a muffled cry against his skin he instinctively reached back for Reid trying to save the body contact he knew was going to be over in less than a minute.

Reid pulled out Luke's body right after his climax and turned to get rid of the condom. For the fragment of a second he really had to struggle against the urge to turn Luke around and pull him against his chest hold him and cover him with kisses. But he got up right away because he knew the second he left this bed it would be alright.


	13. Chapter 13

Luke looked up at the frameless mirror above the sink when he pushed himself up from the bench. By now he had learned how to easily balance on the skates and he easily walked over to wash his hands. The cold light made his face look pale and emphasized the soft lines carved into the skin of his forehead. With a shallow sigh, he spun around and headed for the door to the main restaurant.

He had really hoped he did not look as bad as he felt when he had got up in the morning. The first thing he had noticed had been an awful headache and then that disgusting nauseous feeling had begun to rise from the pit of his stomach just when he'd started to pour the milk over his cornflakes.

Though he had not been able to get the cereals down he still didn't feel hungry. Instead it felt like if a heavy sponge was stored in his insides, spreading wider with every breath he took.

At least tomorrow night he would see Reid. He would definitely have to finally tell him tough. Ever since he had taken the resolution he had missed out on three opportunities and he felt guiltier every single time. The night he had kicked his shirt under the bed with his foot so he would not find it and leave it there, he had almost run after him in the stairs to tell him then and there. Just to get it off his chest. Right then he had felt it would kill him if he kept this inside one minute longer but then there were bad moments to put your cards on the table and worse ones so he had just waited, again. Maybe he had already waited for too long and this would end in a disaster anyway so what did it matter.

It was very tricky to find the right moment anyway. No way he could do it right away. He at least needed to be sure he could feel him close once more. Forget everything else for a while because the feeling of satisfaction and peace was so complete that it drowned all else and spread over him like a shielding blanket. Of course it would not even last an hour and it would not be real. The rush would be quick and strong like it always was and would leave him cold and guilty afterwards.

No not this time, tomorrow he would tell him.

He knew he wouldn't. He couldn't. They never had dinner afterwards anymore and they hardly spoke but it seemed that the more cold Reid acted towards him the less he was ready to let him go and it made him sick that he did not have the guts to do anything about it.

But tomorrow he finally would.

With that thought on his mind he swung the door open and tried to switch to customer mode.

After almost two months of working at the place, Luke had developed a certain routine and he had got to know the lunch crowd well enough to find his way around the hectic rush. The monotonous pattern and the shallow repetitive gestures were catchy for the brain and kept it busy, carrying him through the waiting without his own notice.

It wasn't until 3 p.m. when the crowed began to thin out, that he noticed he felt even sicker than in the morning. He should just not have sat down. After all he was hungry anyway so he could just have kept working and skipped the break.

His arms shaky and burning with heavy pain he pushed himself up from the table and headed towards the counter where Amy was busy cleaning the grill.

''Hey Amy, I just wanted to ask whether I could leave, I am really not feeling well.'' Luke held on to the counter trying to make the spinning stop.

Amy let out an emphasized as she watched him.

''Honey I know I cannot force you to stay but I only have one other waiter today. It's only two more hours do you think you could try?''

She looked at him pleading with her eyes that were framed by a little too much make up.

''Please.'' She added.

Luke pressed his lips together and nodded.

* * *

Luke was sitting on the couch, his legs crossed, his back in a very straight position, trying to focus on his book. Since he had gotten home from work he had slept a few hours and the nausea had almost gone away entirely. He was still shaking with cold though and the headache was coming back. It didn't help either that the letters in the book seemed like a foreign language to him. Every time he looked at them they would just switch positions or blur before his eyes. No matter how often he read the words they meant nothing.

The only thing that was sharp and clear in his mind was the thought that tomorrow he would have to tell Reid that it was over. He had to. There was no way he could get any deeper into this without getting very badly hurt.

Rubbing his temples with both thumbs he leaned forward and tried to take a few deep breathes.

Ok, he had to do something about this. Maybe he could just call Laura and they could go out for a coffee or maybe a walk. Some fresh air and a little bit of company, that would do him good.

He stretched his body forward, leaning over to reach for his cell.

''Hi this is Laura Morgan.''

Her voice immediately made him smile.

''Hey Laura it's Luke how are you doing?''

''Hey Luke. Great how about you?''

''Oh well I've been better. I think I'm coming down with a flu or something.''

''Oh that's nasty. Do you have to work tonight?'' she asked, concern in her voice.

''No. I worked from 10.00 to 05.00.''

''Good.'' She said sounding relieved indeed.

''Listen Laura do you have time to grab a coffee or something?''

''Oh sorry. I have to leave in a bit. I'll meet his guy I told you about last week.'' Though he could tell she was really sorry she had to turn down his offer he still sensed she was radiating with happiness looking forward to her date.

''Hey that's great.'' He said trying to sound confident. ''I'm really happy for you. Tell me all about tomorrow.''

''I will. '' she said cheering. ''Sorry I really have to go now though.''

They exchanged a quick good bye and Luke lowered his arm to his side, still holding the cell.

He remained motionless for a few second and then lifted up the cell scrolling down through his name list.

When he'd reached F he stopped at the third entry and pressed the green key.

Hi you have reached the mailbox of Faith Snyder…

Luke pressed the red key and put his cell back onto the table.

''Oh come on.'' He dropped himself back against the backrest of the couch with a plaintive moan. The headache was so bad now that he almost couldn't bear the bright light anymore and so he pulled his legs up and laid down on his back squeezing his eyes shut. Unfortunately this made everything spin and so he got up again and headed towards the bathroom. He opened the mirror shelf and let his eyes roam over the drugs that were piling up in there. He shuffled through the different boxes and finally he found a few painkillers among the cyclosporine.

He pushed three of them into his palm and swallowed them with a glass of water. The tension in the pit of his stomach was slowly beginning to build again and he let his shoulders sink with a sigh when it suddenly hit him where that came from.

He closed the door looking down as he did and walked over to the kitchen. He opened the fridge and took out the bottle of Vodka. Usually it took at least three drinks to make the tension go away and his body work normal again but he just hoped that this time one would be enough. He sat down and placed the glass onto the table top. The first sip was already breaking away most of it, like it always did and his chest was heaving with ease.

When he lifted the drink up again he could hear the ice clink against the glass and he closed his eyes as he took another sip.

The relief was instant and he took another deep breath as he felt the world around him set right again.

* * *

''God knows this job can get to you.''

Reid rolled his eyes and sighed as he heard the door to the breakroom open. If there was one thing he was not in the mood for then that was colleagues invading his personal space, trying to force him into their conversation.

He leaned across the table to gather his files.

One of them had walked over to the coffee machine and was now filling two cups.

''Yes especially if it's a case like this.'' The younger one sighed as he went for the fridge and then it was to late he was already looking straight at Reid when he spoke the next sentence.

''I'm just back from the emergency room, particularly nasty case,''

Whatever Reid thought. A frown spreading on his face. Two colleagues complaining about the job, he liked to think of that as white noise and god knew he did not want to join into this bonding.

''Substance abuse.'' The young guy continued, never minding his unfriendly expression an Reid suddenly froze.

''Alcohol. We stabilized him but I don't think the kid is going to make it.''

Suddenly Reid felt his whole insides turn into stone, heavy they weighed him down onto the floor.

Please don't. He thought as he struggled to keep his compusure and rushed towards the door.


End file.
